


If You Ever Come Back

by Hessonite_Angel



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: F/M, I mean they come back but..., It gets dark after the first few chapters, Someone dies, canon divergence after season 4
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-15
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-03-05 07:26:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 30
Words: 36,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13383024
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hessonite_Angel/pseuds/Hessonite_Angel
Summary: The day of your wedding is supposed to be one of the happiest days in your life, the first day of your new life with the person you love. Instead, Lotor ended up taking a shot from an assassin for Pidge, but hey, at least he came back? Right?





	1. Crazy Little Thing Called Love

**Author's Note:**

> Before I start the fic let me just say: THIS FIC WILL BE DARK, the first few chapters are okay-ish(?) but it does get dark! It will deal with death, abuse, and other horrible things.  
> Also yes: All the Chapter Titles are Song lyrics. I am very uncreative when it comes to naming things.

He smirked at all the different races and species glaring at him as he made his way to the main control room of the Castle of Lions. A few even had to be held back from punching him. He marched to the main meeting room.

He watched as the Paladins approached him, still wearing their helmets.

“You understand we need to pat you down for weapons, right?” One in Blade of Marmora armor bit out.

“Of course.” The former Prince let the Yellow and Black paladin pat him down and set his weapons to the side. Then all the Paladin’s took their helmets off and the world stopped.

His eye’s trained on the Green Paladin who replaced the helmet with glasses. He felt his heart thump in his chest uncomfortably… but in a good way. He watched her lips entranced not hearing anything.

A snap by his ear forced him out of his mind. Lotor glared at the blue paladin.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” Lotor said confidently squaring his shoulders.

“We were asking your reason for wanting to suddenly join us.” The Black Paladin said. Lotor rolled his eyes.

“I thought that was obvious.” He mumbled. He heard a snort come from the direction of the Green Paladin. “I don’t think we’ve been properly introduced, I know who you all are and you all know who I am, but I think names got lost in translation.”

“I am Princess Allura of Altea, and the Paladin of the Blue Lion.” The Pink Paladin said. “And this is Coran, my advisor.”

“Shiro, I Pilot Black.” The Black Paladin held out his hand to begrudgingly shake Lotor’s. Lotor accepted.

“I’m Lance, Paladin of the Red Lion.” Lotor raised an eyebrow at the Blue Paladin’s claim but didn’t question it.

“Keith, Red Paladin, former Pilot of both the Black and Red Lions.” Lotor nodded at the BoM clad Paladin.

“Hunk, I Pilot Yellow.” Hunk shook Lotor’s hand with vigor. Lotor gave his best smile before turning to Pidge waiting for her to introduce herself.

“Pidge, Pilot of the Green Lion, and this is my brother Matt.” Pidge nodded to the human who shared many of her features. “May we ask why you’re here?”

“I am Lotor, former Prince of the Galra.”

“Former?” Matt asked.

“I’m afraid my father no longer has a use for me, so I’ve been sentenced to termination.”

“Don’t you mean your job has been sentenced to termination?” Lotor shook his head at Pidge’s question. She looked sorry for him.

On missions where Lotor tagged long he always got put with the Black Paladin. Probably to keep an eye on him.

“Hey, Legolas.” Lotor turned his attention to Pidge, who had given a multitude of nicknames.

“Green Paladin.”

“Do you think they’ve removed you from the Galra database?” He raised an eyebrow. “I mean we could hack into the security system, but it’s easier and faster if we don’t have to.”

“I can try if you answer a question for me.”

“Watch it.” Shiro’s authoritative voice rang out. “Pidge we don’t know if we can entirely trust him.”

“Smart thinking, but I think she’s smart enough to decide to trust me or not on her own.”

“Oh, I don’t trust him, but he’s going to play along if it’s a trap in an attempt to gain our trust,” Pidge revealed. Lotor almost got whiplash when he looked at her again. She was extremely and incredibly intelligent. She was open-minded but she wasn’t naïve.

He hadn’t even realized he was staring again until Shiro waved his robotic hand in his face.

“You ok?” Pidge asked. Lotor was dumbfounded. All he could do was nod in response.

She just kept getting more interesting the more time he spent with her.

Pidge had gotten used to the former Prince hanging around her in his free time. If he wasn’t training, doing diplomatic stuff with Allura, or reluctantly helping the rebels, he was around her. No one could pinpoint when it happened, but at one point to find Lotor you just needed to find Pidge.

For example, right now Pidge was working on something on her laptop, in her casual clothes, in the lounge and Lotor was just sitting there scrolling through his communication device, about an arm’s length away(a Lotor’s arm’s length, not a Pidge’s arm’s length).

“Hey, Pidge, I need to talk to Lotor,” Matt said.

“Prince Pain-in-my-ass, Matt needs you.” Pidge didn’t even look up. Lotor rolled his eyes and put his device down.

“Yes?” He mumbled.

“I need to talk to you privately,” Matt stressed. The Galra stood up and followed Matt out into the hall.

“What can I do for you?”

“Everyone with eyes other than Pidge can tell you have a crush on my sister.” Lotor didn’t even blush at Matt’s claim.

“I thought I made my attraction for her obvious.”

“But if you hurt her I will make you suffer a punishment WORSE than death.”

“I understand, though I’m more scared of what she would do to me than you.” Lotor reentered the room with Matt staring shocked at him. Lotor reclaimed his spot by Pidge, but this time closer, he rested his arm on the top of the couch behind her and smirked at Matt. Pidge smiled up at Lotor and pointed something out on her computer.

Then Matt saw it, that lopsided, lovesick, grin. Lotor wasn’t just attracted to Pidge, he had truly fallen in love. He supposed his sister could have someone worse pining for her.


	2. What a Beautiful Wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Character Death

_“Everyone I’d like to say a few words.” Lotor’s voice rang out. The Entire coalition froze. They didn’t know what to expect since this party was to celebrate Zarkon’s defeat. “I think we all owe a lot to the Paladins of Voltron. They gave all of us hope for the future and friendships we can’t replace.” Everyone began clapping. “However, I must ask everyone to indulge me in some selfishness.” Pidge noticed her fellow Paladins, Coran, and her brother all smirk. She watched as her boyfriend of four years walked over to her. “You know, I was waiting for the perfect moment to do this, and I think the time is now.” He grabbed her hands with his and held them to his chest. “Katie, you’re the most amazing creature I’ve ever met. Your intelligence and beauty never cease to amaze me. You’ve given me so many years of happiness. You’ve given me a place to belong. You’ve given me a friendship I can’t replace and someone I can trust with all my heart. So I asked around to see how humans did this, and I think it’s time I asked,” he knelt down and pulled out a box. Pidge’s eyes went wide as she realized what was happening. He opened the box to reveal a simple yet beautiful ring. “Kathrine Holt, will you do me the incredible honor of becoming my wife?”_

_Lotor didn’t know what to expect, but being tackled by his tiny girlfriend into a kiss wasn’t it. He kissed back._

_“Is that a yes?”_

_“Nope, it’s a definitely!” She kissed him again deeply._

       Pidge took a deep breath as she looked at herself in the mirror. Never did she ever dream she’d marry a prince. She couldn’t be happier.

       They had followed traditions from both Human and Galra culture for dating and planning their wedding. The wedding itself was small but it was being broadcasted to the entire alliance.

       She admired how nice her figure looked in the dress. Even after a few year’s, she didn’t develop much in the chest. She hadn’t even worn a dress in years, but she had to admit the dress looked amazing on her. From the veil to the trail that would follow her down the aisle.

       “Katie, are you ready?” Sam asked with a soft smile. Pidge nodded. “I’ve got to be honest kiddo, never thought I’d see you married.”

       “Thanks for the confidence dad.”

       “You’ve just never been interested in anyone before. I always thought you’d end up marrying your computer.”

       “Can’t say I didn’t ever think about it.” Pidge joked.

       Suddenly they stood waiting for the music to signal Pidge to walk down the aisle. As soon as she entered the main cathedral of the church she distinctly heard Lance and Hunk sobbing. She glanced at the other members of Team Voltron. Allura looked like a proud sister, Matt was trying to hide his tears behind his hand. Shiro was barely holding it together. And Keith smiled and gave her a thumb up.

       She almost felt bad for Coran; he was going to be marrying her to Lotor and he was already crying, not as bad as Hunk and Lance, but still crying.

       She nervously looked to Lotor. He was falling in love all over again, she looked like an ethereal goddess from the forest, dressed in white. Before either of them knew it they were standing in front of each other.

       “Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today…” Coran began.

       Before they knew it they were about to share the kiss that would bind them. They heard a few snickers in the crowd from some of the crowd but, ignored it.

       Pidge stood on her toes as Lotor leaned in. They had never kissed like that before. It wasn’t sexual or heated or anything. It was gentle, it was featherlight, it was a promise of eternity with love packed behind it.

       “Katie?”

       “Yea?”  
       “I love you.” Pidge laughed.

       “Yeah, I kinda guessed.” She smiled up at him and pulled him down again. “I love you too, Lotor.” He smiled.

       “That’s good, or else this entire wedding was a waste of time.” Pidge rolled her eyes. “Come on we have reservations waiting.”

       “Lotor what did you do?”

       “We’re only going on a honeymoon fit for a princess.”

       “Lotor…” Pidge whined.

       “Sorry, you’re a princess now, I get to treat you like it.” Lotor took Pidge’s hand.

       And then they walked out of the church hand and hand. Lotor smirked and dipped Pidge into a kiss. Cheers rang out from the crowd. When Lotor finally broke their kiss, Pidge was flushed and dazed.

       “Lotor!” Pidge swatted at him.

       “What am I not allowed to show my wife I love her on my wedding day?”

       “You know what you did!” She pulled him down by the front of his suit.

       “Hmmm… No, I don’t… But maybe,” he smirked and gave her a peck. “Tonight, at the hotel you can show me?” She rolled her eyes as he ran a hand down her side.

       “Can’t you keep your hands to yourself?”

       “With you? Never.” As to emphasize his point he kissed her neck.

       “Lotor!” She hit him again, blushing bright red.

       “Alright, alright, I’ll keep my hands to myself until we get some privacy.” Lotor stood up tall and began to lead the way to their privet ship, never taking his eyes off Pidge.

       Pidge smiled at him warmly. They both smiled at each other warmly with love and happiness.

       Everything was going wonderfully. Everyone outside threw rice and flowers at the pair. Pidge giggled when Lotor spun her every once and awhile, being very careful not to step on her dress or let her trip.

       And suddenly everything was wrong. There was this split second where Lotor went from happy to completely frantic. Suddenly he was tackling Pidge. Her veil fell off and Lotor cradled her head from hitting the ground. Pidge was dazed for a second before she realized something went horribly wrong.

       “Lotor?” She called out. Her voice sounded so small.

       “Are you alright, Katie?” She could hear the pain crack his voice. “Kathrine, please answer me.”  
       “I-I’m fine, what about you?” He smiled at her. She could see blood tainting his white hair. “Lotor what just happened?” He struggled to smile at her, gently caressing her face. “Lotor, answer me!” Their lips met and it felt like it could have been their last.

       “I love you, Katie. Never forget that.” As if on cue he collapsed. Pidge started shouting his name, begging him to open his eyes.

       She could care less that the people around her were panicking and trampling her veil. She could care less that her beautiful white dress was stained with blood. She could care less her wedding and honeymoon were ruined. All that mattered was the man she loved was lying there: heart slowing to a halt as his body grew cold, but protecting her regardless.


	3. Guess Whose Back? Back Again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So there are some mentions of Sex and some slight building up to it but nothing extremely graphic.

_Their_  bed still smelled like  _him_. That was Pidge’s only thought as she curled up in on herself, on  _his_  side of the bed. She hadn’t moved from  _their_ room since the wedding. Everyone would come in, try to comfort her and get her to eat, but with limited success.

Matt threw open the door.

“Pidge! You have to come out now!” Matt looked excited. Pidge didn’t have enough energy to try and be excited with him. “There’s someone here to see you.”

“I just want to be alone…” Pidge said. It sounded like Matt was going to complain before someone cut her off. Pidge heard footsteps and assumed it was Matt leaving. She felt the bed shift; it could be Allura or Shiro trying to get her out of bed again. Slowly arms wrapped around her. “Guy’s this isn’t funny!” She flipped over to slap the offender only to meet  _his_  eyes. Tears welled up in her eyes as he gently cupped her face. “Lotor?”

“Hey, Kitten.” His voice was soft.

“Am I dreaming?” He let his hand move along her neck and shoulders slowly, eye’s trained on it as it followed the curves of her body.

“I’m pleased to say no.” His hand slowly made its way to her hip.

“Am I dead?” He stopped his movements and met her eyes.

“I sure hope not.” He kissed her gently. She kissed back, and they didn’t break until Pidge needed air.

“How are you back?”

“Does it matter right now?” He kissed her again. Slowly the kisses grew more and more passionate.

“I guess not.” Lotor had climbed on top of her.

“I see you’re on my side of the bed.”

“I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”

“I missed you more.” Pidge flung her arms around Lotor’s neck pulling him down into another kiss. Lotor smirked into the kiss. Lotor started to kiss her cheeks and neck. Pidge felt tear’s roll down her cheeks. “I missed you!” She started to sob. “I missed you so much.” Lotor kissed her gently to soothe her.

“Shhh, Kitten, it’s alright I’m right here.” He gently placed one of her hands on his face. His voice was so soft it was barely above a murmur. “I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” He laid down and let Pidge curl up on him: her head rested on his chest, her legs intertwined with his. He rubbed circles on her back and whispered reassurances that he was really there, and he wasn’t going anywhere. Pidge’s sobs slowly became small hiccups, which turned to light breathing as she started to fall asleep to the sound of his voice.

“I love you Lotor.” She mumbled lazily nuzzling his chest.

“I love you too, Katie.” He kissed her on the top of her head gently. She started to drift off. “No one’s going to separate us again, no one’s going to hurt you.” She was out by the last phrase. “And  _No one’s_  going to take you away from me.”

When Pidge woke up again Lotor was propped up on one arm staring at her, the other arm cupped her face, gently stroking the skin of her cheek with his thumb.   
       “Morning, beautiful.” Pidge groaned.

“It’s too early for that Lotor.” He chuckled lightly before proceeding to give her a long kiss on the lips. She bolted up. “LOTOR!” She tackled him and started kissing him all over his face. “I thought I was dreaming!”

“I can tell, though, I have to say, I could get used to this treatment. I should’ve asked you to marry me a long time ago.” He chuckled as she pressed another kiss to his lips. “Why don’t you wait here and I’ll get you something to eat.” Pidge nodded.

“Lotor what happened to your shirt last night?”

“I got warm so I chucked it. I knew you wouldn’t mind the view.” He swung his hips while walking to the door causing Pidge to giggle before she saw the scar on his back. She stood up and ran her fingers along it, it looked like a six-pointed star if you didn’t know any better. “Pidge I thought you liked my butt, not my-“

“Did it hurt?” Pidge asked. Her voice was so small and tiny, he barely heard it.

“Did what?” Lotor spun around hiding it.  
       “Coran said the blast killed you.” Pidge stared up at him with tears in her eyes.

“I… I don’t remember, all I remember was I was worried about you, Kitten.” Lotor whipped the wet tracks from her face. “But I’m here now, and that’s all the matters. So why don’t I go get us something to eat and you take a bath if you’re still in there when I get back I may join you.” He winked and kissed her gently. “I love you, Kitten.”

“Alright, I love you too.”

Lotor smiled as Pidge walked into the connecting bathroom. She didn’t need to see what he was about to do. As soon as he heard the bath running he turned to the doors control panel. He quickly changed the password to get in and out and took Pidge’s handprint and voice out of the database before leaving the room and heading down to the kitchen.

Lotor swiftly made his way back to the kitchen.

“Good, Morning Hunk,” Lotor said making Hunk jump.

“Oh, Hey Lotor, sorry, it’s just a bit weird having you back.” Hunk said smiling. He looked to Lotor’s side. “Where’s Pidge?”

“Katie was exhausted from our reunion last night, she’s asleep right now.” Hunk blushed and Lotor sighed. “She cried, we were both too relieved the other was alright to do anything beyond a kiss.”

“I’m sure she’s glad to have you back. The rest of us are too, maybe you can get her to eat something decent.”

“I swear she’s more of a danger to herself than anyone else could be,” Lotor said shaking his head. “I better bring some food to her to eat when she gets up.” Hunk nodded handing him some dishes with different colored goo. Lotor set them down and started rifling through the kitchen on his own.

“Is there something wrong? With the goo?”  
       “I just wanted to make Katie something special.” Hunk smiled.

“I’m sure she’ll appreciate that.” Lotor gathered some fruits, toast, a peanut butter-esque spread and some juice on a tray to take back to the room.

He entered the room and noticed Pidge was still in the bathroom. He set the tray down on the bedside table and headed over to the bathroom.

Pidge was standing in front of the mirror in her fluffy bathrobe blushing her hair. Lotor walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. He gently kissed her neck.

“Did you have a nice bath, Kitten?”

“Yeah.” She kissed him on the cheek. Lotor picked up bridal style.

“I believe there was a human tradition of carrying your wife throw a doorway or something?” Pidge giggled and nodded against his chest as she threw her arms around his neck.

“I’m so happy your back.”

“I’m happy to be back.” Lotor set her onto the bed. “You know I’m sure I could get some new reservations for our honeymoon.”

“I just want to be with you right now.” He smiled.

They kissed. At some point Lotor’s hand ended up on Pidge’s hip, still clothed in the bathrobe. He paused for a moment, eyes locked onto his own hand.

“Katie? Can I?”

“What?” Pidge looked at him innocent but curious. He coughed and nodded towards the growing tent in his pants. “Huh? Oh… OH! I-I guess.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to do something your uncomfortable with. I can easily handle this by myself.”

“I’ll tell you to stop if I need you to.” Lotor smiled down at her gently before kissing her again.

Lotor ended up with biggest smirk on his face, few hickey’s littering his body, and some very telling scratches on his back. Pidge’s hair was a mess, and she was covered in bites and Hickie’s in various parts of her body. She was still breathing heavily, her head on Lotor’s chest. She was sore but happy.

“That was…” She struggled to find a word. “Beyond amazing.”  
       “Only because it was with you, Kitten.” He stretched and winced. “I don’t think that nickname has even been more fitting.”

“Sorry.”

“Katie, you’re covered in bite marks, I think we’re even.” He kissed the top of her head. “Now how about some breakfast?” She nodded. Lotor smiled and reached for the tray of food.

“I’m so glad you brought things that can be eaten in bed because I don’t think I can walk.”

“Then I think I was successful in my efforts.” Lotor held a piece of fruit in front of Pidge’s mouth. “Now I get to pamper you all afternoon.” Pidge rolled her eyes but ate it anyway. He kissed her then licked the sweet juices from his lips.

“You’re ridiculous, Legolas.” She smiled up at him.

“Only around you.” He looked at her as if she was his entire world like she was some ethereal goddess as they ate. She smiled back him like he was her hero.

He really was. He saved her life. He died for her. And yet he came back.

Pidge blinked and sat up. Lotor stared at her with worry.

“Katie?”

“Lotor, how are you back?” Pidge asked.

“Hmm? Does that really matter? I’m back and we can finally be happy.” Lotor wrapped his arms tightly around her waist.

“Yes, it does, what if whatever brought you back is only temporary? I don’t want to wake up to find you gone again…”

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere,” Lotor assured, starting to kiss her neck again. “Not for a long while.”

“Lotor, this is something we need to talk abo-“ she was cut off by Lotor nipping at her neck with a smirk. He nipped at a different spot causing Pidge to squirm on top of him. “Really? Already.”

“What can I say? I can’t keep my hands off you.” She giggled, her earlier thought abandoned, as Lotor pulled her back down.


	4. In Little Ways Everything Changes

Pidge yawned and got out of bed, thinking of what she should do for the day.

_Lotor has some diplomatic things to handle he’s been avoiding since he got back… I should probably let the others know I’m not dead and work on Green, she probably misses me._

       She looked for clothes to wear. She opted for a baggy t-shirt, probably one if Lotor’s sleep shirts he never wore, a pair of shorts, and a pair of house slippers. She brushed her teeth and thought about what else she should do while she waited for Lotor to get back.

        _Eat something probably… I could work on some code… Probably should train, never know when we’ll need Voltron._

       She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror she blushed. The shirt didn’t really hide the bite marks or hickie’s on her neck. She looked down at her legs. Luckily the shorts hid the ones on her thighs. She sighed.

       “I should probably talk to Lotor about that.” She mumbled. They didn’t hurt, but Pidge didn’t exactly want to show her friends what she had been doing the past few days. She also didn’t want to cover them up because she  _knew_  they would assume the worse. She sighed and walked over to the door.

       She pressed her hand on the panel.

Nothing

       She tried again.

Nothing.

“What’s going on?” She tried once more.

It prompted her to input her password, which it would only do if it didn’t recognize her print or DNA signature. She raised an eyebrow and did so anyway.

Incorrect.

       She started to grow worried, but tried again, maybe she misspelled it.

Incorrect.

       She tried once more slowly hoping she was just rushing before and hitting an incorrect key.

Incorrect: try again in one Varga.

       Pidge’s eyes went wide with panic. She couldn’t even access the database from this room. Lotor had borrowed her laptop for the meeting he was at.

       “HELP!” She started pounding on the door with her fist. “ALLURA! CORAN! ANYONE!”

       After a Varga of trying Keith was the one to save her. Pidge hugged the Galra in relief.

       “Are you alright?” Keith asked looking for any noticeable injuries and blushing when he saw the hickie’s and bite marks.

       “The castle locked me in my room.” Pidge noticed Keith’s gaze on her neck. “Um… Please tell me I don’t need to explain those because that’s going to get awkward.”  
       “So, the castle just locked you in your room?” Keith asked changing the subject.

       “Yeah, first it wouldn’t recognize me, then it wouldn’t accept my password and locked me in. And I couldn’t check it out because Lotor has my laptop.” Keith walked over to the control panel and accessed the database.

       “That’s weird, someone deleted you from the database.”

       “How? And why me?” Keith stayed silent. “Keith? You know something don’t you?”

       “It could have been the group behind… What happened at the wedding…”

Silence. The color left Pidge’s face.

       “Th-they were aiming for me… Oh, my crow…” Keith caught Pidge as she slid to the ground. “I should’ve had been the one who got shot.”

       “Don’t say that Lotor would’ve been heartbroken if you had died.” Keith tried rubbing the smaller Paladin’s back to comfort her.

       “Lotor got hurt because of me.”

       “No, he  _chose_  to take the shot to make sure you’d be safe.”

       “Keith, what if they do it again? We  _know_ they can get into the castle! Nobody’s going to be safe!”

  
“Pidge! Keith, what happened?” Shiro was the first to find them.

       “I don’t know how, but the group from the wedding somehow hacked into the castle, they locked Pidge into her room.”

       “Come on, let’s get you somewhere safe. I’ll talk to Coran and Hunk about sweeping the castle for spies and hackers.”

       “I’ll take her to Green’s hanger,” Keith said helping Pidge up. She kept an arm around Pidge to keep the smaller girl up. “Pidge, can you speak? Ramble if you need to, but I need to know you’re alright.” Pidge nodded and started rambling on about why she referred to Lotor as ‘Legolas’ occasionally. Keith listened and commented on how fitting it was.

       When they got to Green’s hanger Pidge was speechless.

       “Green! Are you ok, girl?” Pidge ran over to the ship. The entire hanger was trashed. Green was tied down by electric ropes. Green started to rumble in response. “Who did this to you?”

       “That would be me, love. I came to check on her for you, and she started freaking out.” Lotor explained. Pidge crossed her arms. “I had to tie her down to stop her from destroying the castle.”

       “I think I’ll be leaving now,” Keith said exiting. Lotor nodded and let him leave before turning his attention to Pidge.

       “I think she sensed I was panicking,” Pidge said. “And you can’t just tie her down, she has feelings!”

       “I understand that, but why were you panicking?” He walked up to his wife and cupped her face. Pidge looked away from him silently. “Katie? Did something happen? Are you alright?”  
       “I got locked into our room, the castle wouldn’t let me out. We think someone people from the group at the wedding got in and deleted my data. I was stuck for a good hour until Keith came by.” Lotor wrapped her up in a hug.

       “That’s horrifying!” He held her to his chest. Once he was sure she wasn’t looking he smirked.

       “I’m fine though, just a bit paranoid and jumpy.” Lotor regained his worried expression and tilted her face up at him.

       “You have reason to be. You almost died, Kitten.” Lotor gently pet Pidge’s hair, holding her to his chest. “You’ve been through so much.”

       “I’m fine… How did your meeting go?”

       “That’s actually what I wanted to talk to you about… They are demanding that I return to the main fleet to govern my people.”

       “I mean that makes sense.” Lotor sat Pidge down on one of Green’s paws. “I don’t want to be far from you right now, though.”

       “You didn’t let me finish.”

       “Sorry.”

       “They are also pushing me to produce an heir, especially since I’m married…”

       “That’s gonna be pretty hard if your there and I’m here.”

       “I know you love being part of Voltron, but it hasn’t been needed in years. Don’t you think it’s time to settle down? More than marriage. Our child is going to need stability, but I don’t want either of us to miss out on any part of it.” He rested his hand on her stomach.

       “We don’t even know if I’m pregnant… I mean we didn’t take any preventive measures to  _stop_ a pregnancy, but it’s highly unlikely to get pregnant on our first try especially given that we’re different species, then again your parents were, and Alteans have a similar biology to humans…”

       “I’d love to hear more, but my point still stands: we’re going to have a child eventually. Voltron isn’t needed anymore. And I don’t want to be too far from you in case something like what just happened, happens. However, my people need me.” Pidge understood what he was asking. Lotor grabbed her hands and brought them to his lips. “I understand you’ll need time to think, but it would make me very happy to enter our new home with you.” Lotor gave her one last kiss on the cheek before he left.

       “What do I do, Green?”


	5. You Put Your Arms Around Me and I'm Home

 Lotor smiled at his wife sleeping on his chest. She had told everyone she was leaving with Lotor tomorrow, or rather today. Lotor glanced at the clock.

        _7:30 am_

       She’d be waking up soon. Her breathing was slow and even. She nuzzled his chest. Lotor hummed pleased. He had one arm around her and the other hand was holding a book.  Pidge’s eyes flickered as she woke up.

       “Why are you up so early, Legolas?” She started to yawn and noticed the book in his hand. “Whatchya reading?”

“I know we aren’t having a baby yet, but I thought it’d be good to do my research.” Pidge blinked up at him.

“It’s going to be a long while before we’re ready for a baby. We’ve barely been married for a month. And for one week of that, I thought you died.”

“I know, I know, I’m just excited to be finally settling down somewhere and getting a family started even if I have to wait a bit.” He kissed her gently on the cheek. “We better get ready. I bet the shuttle is almost loaded.”

“Ok, I’m going to say Goodbye to Green and everyone before we go.”

       “Alright, I’ll meet you on the shuttle.”

       “Ok… see you there.” Lotor kissed her one more time before exiting the bed to get ready. Pidge looked around the room after she told her decision to Lotor he was quick to pack up their things, now it was practically empty except for a few boxes that they needed that morning.

       “Lotor, if you don’t stop messing with my hair, you’re going to be sleeping on your throne.” Pidge threatened as she worked on her laptop in the shuttle. Lotor’s hand paused before continuing petting her hair and running his fingers through it.

       “Why my throne?”

       “Because I’ve hacked the security feed enough in that place to know you there isn’t a couch there.” She swatted at his hand. “Also why don’t you have couches? Do the Galra have something against comfort? Also, where am I supposed to sit? What am I supposed to do as your wife? What if I’m terrible at this? What if we get attacked I don’t have Green to protect us! This was a mistake wasn’t it, oh god what am I going to-“ Lotor stood up and sat in front of his wife. He placed his hands on her shoulders.

       “Calm down. It was a military-run government, couches weren’t a necessity, we have a couch in our room. As for where to sit, my lap is very comfortable”

       “Very funny…”

       “If you don’t like my lap, I’ll get a desk for you to work at in the throne room. What are you supposed to do? Be yourself, your perfect the way you are. You will do fine. Also, part of the perks of being an empress is you don’t have to fight. We’re basically there to make sure the government doesn’t collapse.” Pidge nodded. “Take a deep breath.” He took a deep breath with her before kissing her deeply. “Better?”

       “Yeah… Can I have another?” Lotor chuckled and kissed her again.

       “I love you, Kitten.”

       “I love you too, Legolas.”

       He smiled, returning to his seat. He grabbed a book from his carry-on bag. He felt Pidge lean on him, resting her head on his arm. He kissed her on the head as he wrapped one of his arms around her shoulders. He listened to the gentle tapping on her fingers on the keyboard.

       “So why are we on a privet shuttle?”

       “I wanted some alone time with you.” Pidge paused, before continuing typing. “Something wrong, love?”

       “It’s nothing.” He pulled her tighter to his side.

       “Alright, just know you can talk to me if anything is on your mind.” Pidge smiled at him as if she was unsure, but he didn’t pressure an answer out of her. He rubbed her arm gently.

       “It’s nothing.” Lotor frowned. Pidge stared up at him. “It’s just… I’m gonna miss Green, and Allura, and Coran, and the Guys… I didn’t really spend much time with them before I left… I feel really bad…”

       “You’ll see them again. Allura and I have diplomatic meetings with the Alliance and the Blade of Marmora. I’m sure the other Paladin’s will be her guards.”

       “I guess I just feel like I’ve abandoned them.”

       “I’m sure you and the other paladins realized one of you was going to settle down eventually, start the chain reaction. It’s part of being a sentient being to want to find a mate and settle down.”

       “I know, but I feel bad for starting it.”

       “Don’t, love. If it hadn’t have been you it would’ve been someone else… Probably Hunk.” Pidge smiled.

       “Yeah, probably.”

       “Better?”

       “Much, thank you.” She shut her laptop and cuddled up to Lotor. “I’m so lucky to have you.”

       “I’m pretty sure, I’m the lucky one,” Lotor mumbled.

       “I disagree.”

       “Oh? I have proof. You’re beautiful, intelligent, passionate, curious, and so much more than I could’ve asked for.”

       “Well, you’re a dork, a nerd, handsome and the most amazing man I’ve ever met.” Lotor chuckled and kissed her again.

       “I can’t wait to get you to our new room and treat you like the goddess you are.”

       “I need to make an appearance as your wife, don’t I?”

       “Not until my coronation, till then I get to keep you all to myself.” Lotor started getting handsy again, but Pidge could bring herself to care. “I love you so much, Katie.”

       “I just hope everything goes more smoothly than our… Our wedding.”

       “Don’t think about that.” He soothed. “Just think about us right here and now.”

       “In a shuttle?”

       “You know what I mean.”

       “Yeah…” She kissed him on the cheek. “I love you.”

       The doors opened and A group of trusted High-Ranking commander’s stood guard. Pidge held her laptop to her chest and Lotor stood happily behind her. Lotor was first to exit the ship before turning and holding his hand out to Pidge. Pidge nervously smiled at a few of the generals recognizing them as some of the Galra she fought. A few glared at her. Her smile fell and a low growl-like rumble exited Lotor causing the commanders to smile wearily at Pidge. Lotor wrapped his arm around Pidge protectively as they began to walk.

       “Lotor, I can handle myself.”

       “You are the new Empress of the Galra: they should treat you as such.”

       “It’s not that big of a deal, their just butt-hurt I kicked their asses in the past.”

       “Kathrine, I’m not arguing this with you.” Lotor’s eyes were scanning the area. Pidge’s eyes were trained on her husband.

       “If we aren’t arguing about this you can take your arm off.” Lotor’s focus centered in on his wife. Pidge felt the air around her grow thick.

       “We are  _not_  talking about this right now, but the arm stays  _on_ , got it?” He growled out. She stared up at him in shock, he never used that kind of tone on her before. She hadn’t noticed she had stopped until Lotor pushed her gently forward. “Let’s keep moving.”

       “A-alright.” Pidge was quiet the entire time. The commander’s following them didn’t even bother to give a tour of the place, instead just made sure the royal couple made to their new room and left, leaving only two to guard the door after Lotor gave orders to start of prep for the coronation. He shut the door and spun Pidge into a kiss.

       Pidge froze up, she didn’t want to admit it before, but ever since his return, Lotor had been different. He was being secretive and did his best to keep her in his eyesight or room. She thought it was just shock from the assassination attempt at first but now…

       She was broken on her thoughts by her back hitting the mattress, Lotor’s lips still on hers. One of his hands tangled itself in her hair and the other wrapped around her waist. She pushed at his chest. He broke the kiss and looked down at her.

       “Is something wrong?” Lotor asked.

       “I’m just not in the mood right now.” Pidge lied. Lotor stared at her for a few seconds before climbing off.

       “I’m sorry, I scared you earlier, didn’t I?” Lotor sat on the bed, propped up with some pillows. “I’m just scared that something will happen to you. I guess I got a tad out of hand.” Pidge simply nodded and curled up next to him. Lotor smiled at her.

       Pidge set her head on his chest and listened for his heartbeat to calm her as his fingers ran through her hair.

Nothing.

       She bolted up, and Lotor pulled his hand away in worry.

       “LOTOR!”  
       “Kitten, are you alright?” Lotor stared at her, her face was pale like she saw a ghost.

       “Y-you don’t have a heartbeat!” Lotor’s eyes went wide and he racked his brain for a logical lie to tell his wife. “Why don’t you have a heartbeat? How are you back?”

       “It doesn’t matter.” He climbed back on top of her and started to kiss her neck and jaw. “All that matters is I’m back and we’re together, and you’re safe.” As if to punctuate his point, every few words he kissed her. Pidge felt his hand under her shirt, gently stroking her side and stomach, working its way up. Her mind went blank temporarily.

       Then it hit her.

       “Stop, stop, stop!” She pushed his face away from her and ripped his hand out from under her shirt.

       “What?”

       “What do you mean what? You do this every time I bring up how your back!” She moved away from him, his hand trailing after her as if to pull her back. “I’m your wife I deserve some answers! Married couples don’t hide secrets like this from one another! How did you come back? Why don’t you have a heartbeat? Why are you so scared to tell me? What’s going on?” Tear’s started to spill from her eyes. “Ever since you got back you’ve been different.”

       “I told you it doesn’t matter how I’m back!”

       “It does to me.” Her voice sounded so small. Lotor stared at his wife who had started crying.

Shit.

       She wasn’t supposed to cry. Lotor tried to wipe the tears only to get his hand swatted away.

       “Why don’t you trust me? I’m your wife.”

       “I do, honey, I love you with all my heart.”

       “THAT’S NOT WHY I’M UPSET!” Lotor jumped back. “I want you to trust me! I don’t know if it’s an Altean or Galra marriage thing but it IS a human marriage thing! Maybe I shouldn’t have come…”

       “I want you here, Pidge. I want you by my side while I rule. I… I…”

       “Then why won’t you trust me?” Her voice cracked. Lotor pulled her to his chest.

       “It’s not that I don’t trust you, I’m… just not ready.” His voice was soft. Pidge stared up at him. “I mean… I died… When I woke up I was alone… I didn’t know if you were truly safe and alright… For all I knew you had died with me… I was so scared I was gonna enter our room at the Castle of Lions and it was gonna be empty.” Lotor kissed her. He kissed her like she was going to disappear. He kissed her as if that was going to fix everything. He broke the kiss when he felt Pidge pull away. Lotor kissed the tears falling down her face while Pidge gasped for air.

       After a few minutes, Lotor laid Pidge down gently. She looked exhausted. Her eyes were puffy from crying, her lips were a bit swollen from Lotor.

       “Promise me we’ll figure anything out before your coronation?”

       “We can try.” Pidge cupped Lotor’s face with one of her hands.

       “Lotor, I may be upset, but that doesn’t change the fact I really do love you.” His heart would’ve skipped a beat if it still beat in his chest. Her smile was so honest and full of love he could feel it radiated from her into him.


	6. Everybody Want to Steal My Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Chapter contains: Assholes not respecting Boundaries, groping [unwanted], and another attempt on PIdge's life.

       Lotor smiled at down at his wife as she stared at herself in a mirror. The dress was just as elegant as the one she wore for their wedding. She looked just as ethereal if not more. Today she wore a dark purple dress that reached the floor with a slit that went from the ground to about where her fingers would rest by her sides. The top was a halter type that was held up by a purple metal that laid around the base of her neck. It was long sleeved, almost like gloves, but exposed her freckled shoulders. Her back was also exposed by the dress but covered by the cape connected to the dress. She also wore a deep purple eyeshadow, masquerade, dark red-almost-purple lipstick and light blush. She looked amazing if a little uncomfortable.

       “Maybe I should wear heels.” She mumbled moving to take off the fancy black sandal-like shoes she wore. Lotor stopped her.

       “You’re fine the way you are. Besides my people haven’t had a proper queen in 10,000 years.” Lotor stood up straight an offered Pidge an arm. She took a moment to take him in.

       He wore black armor that made him look regal and powerful.

       “It’s not fair, you get armor and a sword, and I get a tight dress and a dagger.” She mumbled. Lotor chuckled.

       “You’re right it’s not, Kitten. But I just wanted an excuse to show off how lovely you are.” Pidge rolled her eyes but took the arm offered to her.

       “So today, you become an emperor.” She looked at him in awe. “But, if you are a bad leader I’m rejoining Voltron and coming back with Green to give you a lesson.” He chuckled at her joke. “Don’t laugh I’m being serious.”

       “I know.” Lotor led her to the throne room. Zarkon and Haggar waited for the couple there.

       “Lotor.” Zarkon greeted.  
       “Father.”

       “I see you brought the Green Paladin.”

       “I know you and Haggar missed the wedding, but she  _is_  my wife.” Pidge shifted uncomfortably under Haggar’s gaze, it was the first time she faced the Altean without armor.

       “As long as she doesn’t distract you from your duties.” Haggar turned her attention to Lotor. “I suppose you two have already begun the process of making an heir?”

       “Can we please not talk about that right now!” Pidge blushed bright red.

       “If we have, it’s none of your business what my wife and I do,” Lotor smirked. “Now, I have a coronation to attend. Come on, Kitten.”

       The coronation went off without a hitch. Now Pidge just had to survive the reception afterword. She felt so out of place. Compared to the rest of the party goers she was short. Most of them were wearing military uniforms. And they kept glaring at her, she didn’t know if it was because she defeated their past leader, was married to their current leader [and wasn’t Galra], or just because she was a paladin.

       She sat down at one of the many tables while Lotor mingled.

       “Empress Kathrine, it an honor to meet you.” One of the high up soldiers considered a war hero walked up to her.

       “Call me Pidge. May I ask your name?”

       “Goyil, at your service.” He bowed to her.

       “Nice to meet you too, Goyil. You know, you’re the first person to approach me. Thank you.”

       “Not everyone is confident enough to approach our new Emperors wife.”  
       “They shouldn’t have to be. I was just a regular citizen on my planet.”

       “It’s also because a few of us soldiers made a bet on who could woo you and I got first pick.”

       “Is that a joke?” Goyil put a hand on Pidge’s thigh.

       “Come on, just go down easy, we won’t tell Lotor.”

       “Take your hand off me right now!” Pidge warned.

       “Or what? You don’t have your fancy ship or Bayard. And who do you think everyone will believe? A trusted High Ranking Galra soldier or the alien who married into royalty after being on the rebel side for years.” Pidge grabbed his hand and threw him onto the table.

       “Don’t EVER touch me like that again!” Everyone around her froze.

       “You think you’re so above me? I worked for my position, you slept your way into yours.” Pidge went to punch him only to have someone grab her hand. Lotor pulled her back, drug her to his throne, and sat her down.

       “Why did you stop me!? Someone has to teach him a lesson!” Pidge struggled to fight Lotor’s force that kept her sat down.

       “Stay here. I’ll deal with him.” Lotor growled. “But first I have to prove something to people like him.”

       “And what is that?”

       “You are mine.” He growled. Pidge opened her mouth to say something but Lotor slammed his mouth onto hers. The force of it caused Pidge’s head to hit the throne. When Lotor broke it Pidge was panting for air. Lotor wiped the spit from his face before kissing Pidge on the cheek. “Now stay.” Pidge could only nod, the pain in the back of her head had her a bit dazed. Lotor marched over to Goyil. “You had some very unsavory things to say to my wife. Do you dare repeat them?”

       “All of us are thinking it, there’s only one reason you’d marry someone below you-“ Lotor grabbed the soldiers throat.

       “I’ll have you know my wife and I didn’t do anything until after we were married, at her insistence. And I will not tolerate any disrespect towards her.” Lotor threw Goyil at the foot of the throne. “Now apologize, and after that, I don’t want to see you near her ever again!”

       “I-I’m sorry, Pidge.”

       “You do not get the honor of calling her that! She is Empress Kathrine to whelps like you!”  
       “My sincere apologies Empress Kathrine.” Goyil picked himself up and ran. A few other soldiers and a commander were hot on his heels. Pidge watched in dazed wonder.

       “I want them imprisoned,” Lotor ordered the nearest, highest ranking officer.

       “Would you like them killed, sire?” The Officer asked nervously.

       “No, I shall decide on their punishment later.” Lotor returned to Pidge. He noticed her dazed, but slightly pained expression. “Katie, are you alright?”

       “I hit my head.” Lotor checked the back of her head, sure enough, a bruise was beginning to form. Lotor picked her up Bridal style and cradled her to his chest.

       “The rest of you should enjoy the festivities, I’ll be helping my wife retire for the night, but I will be back.”

       Lotor laid Pidge down in bed.

       “I’m sorry, love. Does it hurt?”

       “Hmmm? I’m fine.” Pidge curled up on the large bed, making her seem even smaller.  Lotor stroked her hair, being mindful of the bruise he caused.

       “You need to let me know if I hurt you.” He mumbled. He wasn’t even sure if she heard him. He quickly changed her into some comfortable pjs before making his exit. “Kitten, I’m locking you in, so don’t panic.”

       After mingling at the party for a few hours he returned to his room. As soon as he turned to the hall he saw the door was wide open. He ran towards it.

       When he got to his room he saw a figure holding a pillow over Pidge’s face, and her arms limp by her side. He drew his sword in a blind rage and killed the figure. After he threw the body off Pidge he felt for a pulse.

       It was weak but there. He was so glad he learned human CPR from Lance. Soon Pidge’s eyes opened and she started gasping for air.

       “Katie! What happened?”

       “I-I don’t know, I kept drifting in and out of sleep and I heard the door open, and I couldn’t breathe.” Lotor nodded and cradled her to his chest. He glared at the body on the ground.

       “Pidge, go change and bathe. I’ll handle everything.” He gently ushered her into the bathroom and grabbed her a change of clothes. He changed the sheets and cleaned the blood off the floor the best he could. He got rid of the body and investigated how the hitman could’ve gotten into the room in the first place. He checked the doors security system and deleted everyone who wasn’t himself from that door. He reentered the room.

       Pidge hadn’t left the bathroom yet. Lotor ran in to find her. She was in the bath staring blankly as she washed the blood off. He walked over and removed the armor from his arms and torso. He worked some soap into her hair. She blinked and whipped around, she blushed as soon as she saw it was Lotor.

       “It’s ok, Kitten, just let me spoil you.” His voice was low and soft. His fingers worked the shampoo into her hair carefully.

       “I… I shouldn’t be reacting like this. I fought in a war… I should be used to people trying to kill me.”

       “The war is over though, and whoever is after you used underhand methods to attempt to take you from me.” He placed a kiss on her shoulder, ignoring the taste of soap.

       He helped bathe her and watched her get dressed. He picked her up bridal style and set her on the bed. He changed the rest of his armor out for a pair of PJ pants, leaving his shirt off.

       Lotor laid down next to his wife. Pidge started to doze off as Lotor stroked her hair. Her breathing was starting to even. He kissed her lips gently. He stroked her cheek. He listened to her soft breaths. He wished he could fall asleep with her.


	7. Gotta Real Good Feeling Somethin Bad About to Happen

       Pidge sat on a small throne that Lotor set up for her by his. He hadn’t let her far from his sight ever since the assassination attempt. It was getting annoying. He checked everything she ate and drank. If he couldn’t take her with him somewhere he locked her in their room. He was extremely cautious of the tech he handed her to mess with.

       “Are you alright, Love?” Lotor broke her internal rant. She looked up at Lotor. He stared at her with a mix of worry and love. He was wearing formal armor again. It made him look regal and powerful. She nodded and watch Lotor turn his attention to a High-Ranking Commander who smiled at her. It was a woman, she looked half balmeran.

       “Hello Empress Kathrine, Emperor Lotor.” She was a kind looking Galra. She saluted respectfully.

       “Hi.”

       “Commander Bevaque.”

       “I hate to pry, but a lot of us were worried about the state of the royal family.”

       “Why?” Lotor straightened up in his seat.

       “Well… It’s just… The assassination attempts on the Empress. While a few of us are worried about her safety and your emotional stability, there are a few of the others who are worried that she could be killed before producing an heir.”

       Pidge accidentally shocked herself with the piece of tech she was working on. She was bright red.

       “On Earth having a child is a very big decision. I’m not against having a child, I’m just worried Lotor and I aren’t ready. We just moved and we’re still settling into our new roles. Plus, the assassins aren’t helping. I don’t want to risk the health of a child.”

       “Kitten, your rambling.” Lotor calmed her before returning to Bevaque. “Do not worry, I’m sure Katie and I shall alleviate your concerns any month now.” Bevaque smiled and left.

       “What do you mean we’ll handle their concerns any month now?” Pidge bit as soon as the Commander left.

       “I hate to rush things, but their right. As an Emperor, I need to have an heir. You know I wouldn’t be able to marry again if I lost you. The assassination attempts are very worrying.”

       “That doesn’t change the fact that we might not be ready! Lotor, I’ll be unable to fight if I get pregnant!”  
       “You’re not meant to fight anymore!” Pidge stood up and dusted off her pants.

       “It’s my body Lotor! I get the final say!” Lotor grabbed her arm.

       “Kathrine! You knew what you were getting into when you agreed to marry me. When we were dating I let you know that if we got married the Galra empire would rush some things in our marriage. Right now; it’s a baby. Maybe we need a baby right now. The assassination attempts would likely stop if they found out you were carrying the next heir to the Galra throne.” She glared at him and he glared back.

       “You know what? If you tell me how you came back to life, we can try for a baby.”

       “How about I tell you the entire truth and we HAVE a baby.” Pidge thought about it for a second. She nodded. “The witch brought me back to life with quintessence. Father realized he no longer had control of the empire, and they were hoping to use me to make the decisions they wanted.”

       Pidge sat back down. She was pale and stuck in her own head. Lotor picked her up and set her on his lap.

       “Now you know why I didn’t tell you, love.”

 

       A couple weeks later Pidge sat in the bathroom staring at a pregnancy test for the umpteenth time. She kept her side of the bargain, they were currently trying for a child, but she still didn’t feel ready.

       But ready or not it was happening. She was currently holding a positive pregnancy test. It was the 5thpositive test she had taken that week to confirm that she was in fact pregnant. She was going to have to tell Lotor.

       She rested a hand on her flat stomach.  _She was going to have to tell Lotor_. She opened the door.  _ **SHE WAS GOING TO HAVE TO TELL LOTOR**_. Lotor was in the middle of telling the guards out the door their orders. She quietly walked up to her husband

       “Lotor, I have to tell you something.” The guards immediately went silent.

       “You may go.” He ordered to the guards. They each left. Lotor noted how they went silent upon seeing his wife sporting a purple sundress. “What is it?” Pidge handed him the test, her hand shaking. Lotor grabbed the test and examined it. “What is it?”

       “It’s a…um… Pregnancy test for humans.”

       “Pregnancy test?”

       “It’s the fifth one like that.”

       “Meaning?” She handed him a box. He read the instruction.

       “You’re pregnant?” Lotor asked. Pidge nodded. “You’re pregnant!” He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her in a spin. “Katie! You’re pregnant!” He kissed her. “We’re having a baby! Katie, you don’t know how happy you’ve made me.” He set her down on the bed. “I can’t wait to see their little face.”

       “It’s going to be about nine months.” She mumbled as Lotor shoved his face into her neck. He wrapped himself around her.

       “I love you.” He started kissing her all over. “I love you so much.” Pidge smiled at her husband’s behavior. Maybe they were ready for a baby. Maybe everything would be alright.

       Pain shot through her neck and shoulder. She couldn’t even scream. She heard a pleased purring coming from Lotor. He kissed her swiftly on the lips. She tasted blood. Pidge clamped a hand where her shoulder and neck met. She felt blood, as well as deep bite marks. That was going to scar.

       “Lotor?” She stared up at him confused. She would’ve scouted away from him if she wasn’t caged by him and the bed. He looked so happy and content. She noted the blood smudged on his lips.

       “I love you so much, Kitten.  I’m so glad your mine. I’m so glad you’re having our baby for me.” Pidge was frozen. Lotor had a loving look in his eye but it looked crazed. His eyes were practically glowing. He tilted her face from the wound as if to admire his handy work. “Everyone will know your mine now.”

       “Why?” That was the only word she could say. She was in pain. She was terrified. And she was confused.

       “Don’t worry about it. Get some rest darling.” He kissed the mark he left, humming a little when Pidge hissed in pain. “You need your strength. You’re carrying our baby. I’m so excited to tell everyone. I should get someone started on a nursery!”


	8. Rockabye

       Pidge took a deep breath when she watched Lotor leave the room for the day. He kissed her and then kissed her now showing stomach. As soon as the door shut Pidge grabbed the homemade communicator. She contacted the Castle of Lions, hoping Coran, Shiro, or Matt would pick up.

       “Pidge?” Matt looked shocked to see her. “How are you? Everything all right in Paradise?” He started to joke. “You know I’m a bit upset you didn’t call us to tell us you and Lotor are having a baby. We had to find out from his announcement to the entire empire and alliance.” Matt stopped and noticed something was wrong. Pidge looked scared, she had a noticeable scar on her neck. “What’s wrong? What happened over there?”

       Pidge broke down and explained everything. The party, the Galra at the party who made moves on her, almost dying, the empire’s insistence on her having a child, the truth about Lotor coming back from the dead, the deal she made, Lotor biting her, him keeping her locked up in their room for safety.

       “Matt, he’s not the man I married anymore. He wasn’t when he first came back. I was just in denial. I was so happy to have him in my life. But he kept using sex as an excuse not to talk about everything that was worrying me. He pressured me into coming here with him. He pressured me into having the baby.” Pidge sobbed. Matt listened. “I just want to come home. Matt… I have a hacking program and a ship ready… I… I don’t know if I should…”

       “Katie, are you going to be happy there?”

       “No, but-“

       “Can you see a positive future?”

       “No…”  
       “I know you may not want to hear this, but if this is how you’ve been living and how you’re going to be living, maybe leaving is the right choice.”

       “But I love him…”

       “But love isn’t worth being miserable.” Pidge nodded. “I’ll keep an eye on the Castle’s security if I see your ship I’ll unlock the doors.” Pidge nodded, she heard Lotor start to unlock the door to the room.

       “I have to go, Matt, love you.” She shut off the communicator and shoved it under her pillow.

       It wasn’t Lotor. Though Pidge did recognize the group who entered.

       “Come on Paladin, we’re getting you out of here,” Zethrid said.

       “We have to hurry though,” Acxa said from the door.

       “We still need a ship,” Ezor interjected.

       “I have one ready to go, but why are you guys here?”

       “You think no one saw how unhappy you are when you’re seen?” Zethrid picked Pidge up. The three former generals looked at Pidge’s protruding stomach.

       “They didn’t show that on the broadcasts…” Ezor said.

       “Zethrid carry her. We have to move before Lotor gets back.” Acxa ordered.

       “He has meetings until lunch,” Pidge added. The former generals looked at the former paladin. “What? I’m his wife, of course, I know my husband’s schedule.”

       Later Lotor returned to the room only to find it empty. He looked in the bathroom, no one. He ripped the sheets and pillows off the bed. He found the home-made communicator. He hacked into it and found the call logs. He marched to the ship bay.

       “Emperor Lotor! I was not expecting to see you today.” The Bridge Commander said.

       “Prepare a ship immediately.”

       “Any specifications?”

       “Fast, but safe enough to transport life forms.”

       “Yes, sir.”

 

       Pidge stared at the vast amount of outer space just out her window.

       “When I flew Green I never thought I’d miss this view.” Pidge mused allowed. The Generals stayed quiet. “I missed it. Lotor doesn’t let me out much, even for meals… I hope I can raise the baby alright alone.”  
       “You’re going to keep it?” Zethrid asked.

       “Of course, why wouldn’t I? It’s still going to be my child.”

       “Do you have any names in mind?” Ezor asked.

       “… I’d like to name them Narti if it’s a girl. To honor you three, would you all be alright with that?”  
       “We’d be honored,” Acxa said smiling. “And What about if it’s a boy?”  
       “Marmora, after The Blade of Marmora. I want them to be proud of their Galra heritage.” Pidge placed her hand on her stomach. She started singing to the unborn child. “She tells him ‘ooh love’, No one’s ever gonna hurt you, love. I’m gonna give you all of my love, Nobody matters like you. She tells him your life ain’t gonna be nothing like my life. You’re gonna grow and have a good life, I’m gonna do what I’ve got to do. So, rockabye baby, rockabye. I’m gonna rock you. Rockabye baby, don’t you cry. Somebody’s got you, Rockabye baby, rockabye. I’m gonna rock you. Rockabye baby, don’t you cry.” Pidge’s voice filled the com’s. The former generals just listened, unsure of what to say.

       Then the entire ship shook.

       “WE’RE UNDER ATTACK!” Ezor shouted. Pidge looked at the Castle of Lions, it was so close, just a short spacewalk away.

       “We need to abandon ship,” Pidge said. A chorus of disbelief followed. “Look we can drift to the Castle slowly, but this ship is too big of a target!”

       “Alright! Let’s do this!” Acxa shouted. They all ejected out of the ship and floated to the Castle, taking just a moment to watch the ship they borrowed get beamed into the Small prison ship. Pidge watched the air locked doors of the Castle open. She was so close. Acxa was first to land, then Zethrid and Ezor. Zethrid went to grab Pidge and help her land.

       The ships tractor beam caught Pidge. The glimmer of hope she had faded. It pulled her into the ship. One of the Commanders lead her to the Captain’s quarters and didn’t leave until she entered. Lotor sat on the bed, arm’s crossed, one leg over the other. He looked pissed. Pidge held her head high despite her hope of escape being crushed. Lotor took the home-made communicator, it was badly dismantled, and threw it at her feet.

       “You mind explaining this? And where you were going with our child?” His voice was eerily calm.

       “You probably watched the video call. Why are you even bothering to ask?” Pidge looked at the ground ignoring him. Lotor stood up. He calmly walked over and took Pidge’s space suit’s helmet off. He slammed it to the ground. Pidge winced when she heard a crack. Lotor smashed it with his foot.

       Lotor grabbed Pidge by the shoulder and spun her around, forcefully grabbing her arms and handcuffed them behind her back.

       “If you’re going to act like a rebel prisoner, I’ll treat you like one!” He roughly pushed her to the bed, when she tripped he caught her, cautious of her stomach. He forced her back first onto the bed. “Now, you can either act like a prisoner, and I’ll lock you up in our room and cuff you so the only place you can go is to the restroom, or you can be a good little wife and behave! It’s up to you, Katie.” Lotor hovered over the mark that had scared over, his breath tickling it. “Either way you aren’t leaving me.” He bit down on the mark. Pidge screamed and struggled, but Lotor was too heavy for her to kick off, especially when she was carrying a child.

       Lotor pulled off Pidge after she stopped struggling for a good few minutes. She had passed out from either pain or using too much energy, possibly both. He smirked and uncuffed her. He picked her up and carried her to the bridge bridal style.

       “How much longer till we return home?” Lotor asked. He gracefully took his seat in the captain’s chair, holding Pidge to his chest.

       “A few Varga’s, sir.”

       “Good, I need to check on the Empress’s and baby’s vitals. Make sure their still healthy after the kidnapping attempt.” Lotor gently brushed hair out of Pidge’s face, as if he wasn’t the reason she was so discolored. To the crew on the ship, he looked like a loving husband, caring for his overwhelmed wife.  He rested another hand on Pidge’s stomach, wishing for the unborn child to kick, or something.


	9. But Then I See My Baby

       Sweat covered Pidge’s body. She looked around the small med lab she was in a daze. She heard a baby cry, maybe a few. Her baby. She felt a cold hand cup her face.

       “Oh, Katie it’s a girl.” Lotor’s voice was foggy to her. She tried focusing on him. “What do you think of Kitora Katrina?” Pidge nodded, too tired to care about the name, besides it was lovely, and she just wanted to hold her baby.

       Lotor put Pidge’s glasses on her so she could see clearly, despite her defiance the past months she called out to him when her water broke. Haggar handed Pidge the baby, carefully Lotor had to help her hold them. Zarkon entered the room to see his grandchild, no matter how pitiful they may be.

       “She has the same eyes as Honerva.” Zarkon’s voice broke through. He was right, their Altean genes were more prominent because of their human genes, than the Galra genes. They had tanner skin than Pidge, but paler skin than Haggar had when she was Honerva. The little bundle had purple Altean markings. Pidge noticed Zarkon staring at the newborn.

       “… Do you want to hold her?” Pidge asked. Lotor turned his attention to his father. Haggar was staring at Zarkon as well. He nodded. Pidge handed Zarkon the baby

       “She’s so tiny,” Zarkon mumbled.

       “Her names Kitora Katrina,” Lotor told him. Zarkon handed her back to her mother.

       “Thank you, Paladin.”

       “No problem. My dad would probably have been the same way.” Pidge said calmly.

       Pidge caressed the baby gently as Lotor stared in awe. She looked just like her mama, brown hair and golden eyes. Lotor noted the child had his ears.

       “She’s probably hungry…” Pidge mumbled. Haggar and Zarkon left the new parents to their child. Pidge ignored her husband’s stare as she adjusted the baby to drink. “I think I’ll call you KitKat for short, sweetie-pie.” She mumbled to the baby. As soon as the baby was burped she fell asleep, Pidge joining her shortly after.

       He gently cupped her face a kissed her. He hadn’t been able to kiss her without her struggling since he brought her back home. It was really a shame he had to lock her up, but maybe the baby would strengthen their relationship once more. He checked on all their vitals, not trusting Haggar to have done a good job. They were both healthy. He listened to the sounds of the room: Pidge and KitKat’s breathing, the sounds of the medical equipment, the sounds of the ship. He kissed his daughters head. He’d move the baby to the nursery tomorrow.

       “Lotor…” He spun around at Pidge’s voice. She was still asleep. Tears were streaming down her face. Lotor grabbed her shoulders and gently shook her. One of her hands flew to her stomach. “My baby? ….where….?”

       “Katie, wake up.” Her entire body was shaking. She kept mumbling about the babies. “You’re having a nightmare, honey! Wake up!” He squeezed her hand tightly. Pidge’s eyes bolted open and she threw her arms around the nearest person, who happened to be Lotor. She started to sob into his shoulder. “Are you alright?”

       “Someone took my baby.” Lotor glanced over at the child fast asleep in a makeshift crib. “They ripped my child from me.”

       “That would never happen, Kitten.” He unwrapped her arms from him. He kissed the tears running down her face. “As long as I’m here you and the baby are just fine. I won’t let anything happen to the-hmpf!” Lotor was caught surprised. Pidge’s lips were on his. She was kissing him desperately. He laid her down without breaking the kiss. Once she was laid down he broke it. She looked up at him with pleading eyes.

       “Don’t take my baby from me.” Lotor kissed her again in response.

       “I won’t, darling. I won’t take our child from you.” Pidge let him kiss her. He kissed along her jaw and neck, lingering on the scar he gave her months ago. “I missed this. I missed being close to you like this. You only let me near you when your sleepy or sleeping. I missed you so much, Katie.” He stopped kissing her after a few minutes and caressed her face. “You should get some rest. We have a big day tomorrow. We get to announce our little Princess’s healthy birth to the entire empire.”

       “Can you put her crib by me? I want her to be the first thing I see when I wake up.” Lotor’s heart would’ve skipped a beat, had it still been beating. He moved the crib right by Pidge’s bed. She even let him cuddle up with her. She fell asleep pretty fast. Lotor couldn’t wait for morning to come.

       Pidge let Lotor dress her up for the event. She wore a long light purple off the shoulder dress with long sleeves and golden embroidery. She rocked KitKat back and forth while Lotor finished fixing his hair.

       “You look lovely, honey. And KitKat looks adorable.” Lotor leaned down to kiss Pidge.

       “I wish Allura could see her, she looks Altean.” Pidge mumbled. Lotor froze then nodded.

       “We should show her to our people.”

       “ _Your_ people.” He stared at her. Pidge wasn’t even looking at him, instead, she was focused on making sure her child was calm and happy.

       “What was that?”

       “I’m not Galra, and I don’t govern them. They’re your people.” Her voice was soft, setting KitKat into a carriage/stroller/crib Lotor set up. Lotor grabbed Pidge’s wrist and ripped her away from the crib.

       “They’re your people too, you are my wife.” He used his free hand to rub her scar with his thumb. “You’re mine.” His eye narrowed and his grip tightened on her wrist. Pidge stared back in defiance. Lotor threw her onto his thrown. He bent down to be just above eye level. His hair acted as a curtain, cutting them off from everything else. He lifted her chin and forced her to meet his eyes. “I think you need to learn a lesson in obedience before the commanders see us.” He went to kiss her again, but this time Pidge slapped him. He stood up, ignoring the pain in his cheek.

       “I’m not some pet who can be taught obedience.” She clenched her fist.

       “No, you’re my wife, but you will behave or else.”

       “You don’t scare me, Lotor.” He turned from Pidge to the crib.

       “You know, I want her to be able to get to know their mother. I really don’t want to have to separate you from her.” Pidge’s blood drained from her face. Lotor picked up little KitKat, who cooed curiously at her father. He ran a figure along her purple markings. He walked over and placed the child in his wife’s arms. Pidge looked terrified. Lotor raised a hand and caressed her face. “Be a good wife and you won’t have to worry about that, alright?” Pidge gulped and nodded, holding KitKat close to her chest. Lotor smirked and kissed her with little resistance. “Let’s open the doors to  _our_  people, shall we?”

       Pidge could only stand there, frozen, holding her child to her.


	10. I Feel LIke I'm Out of My Mind, I Feel LIke My Life Ain't Mine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIG WARNING: This chapter contains mention of implied rape

       Pidge tried not to flinch away from Lotor when he set his hand on hers. Her eyes were trained on her child. The commanders in the meeting room were passing her around like they were part of a family while discussing plans to retake over the universe from the Voltron coalition.

       “The Green lion no longer has a paladin, so the coalition won’t be at its strongest.”

       “Because of the lack of their savior, their moral will shatter.” Pidge tried not to listen to their conversation. All the hard work to take down Zarkon. Everything she had worked for alongside Lotor… Who he used to be.

       She could still remember their first date. Lotor had been so awkward. They had attended a festival the rebellion was hosting on Olkarion. Lotor had asked her to go with him. He also requested they go alone together. At this point, he wasn’t really to be trusted, so when he tried to make a move on Pidge, she tazed him with her Bayard.

       She broke from her thoughts upon Lotor standing her up. She seemed to have zoned out during the meeting. Pidge quietly walked over to the stroller and smiled at her baby

       “You spaced off during the meeting, what were you thinking about, Kitten.” Lotor secured his arm around his wife as they took a walk around the ship before returning to their privet quarters.

       “Our first date…” Lotor blinked not expecting that answer.

       “That’s right you shocked me!”

       “In my defense at the time, I didn’t exactly trust you. How was I supposed to know you’d attempt to put moves on me?” Pidge let herself pretend they were a happy couple for a bit. She pretended they were both happy. She pretended Lotor didn’t die only to be brought back with quintessence. She pretended that she wasn’t trapped here. Lotor stopped her on the bridge, they had a view of outer space.

Pidge placed her hand on the glass. Memories she had put behind her.

       Flying in Green. Finding Matt. Bonding with her team and discovering an entirely new family. The Olkari. Shay and the other Balmerans. Kaltenecker. She hadn’t realized she was crying until Lotor wiped a tear from her cheek.  Pidge stared up at him. She could see the subtle differences in who her husband was now, then who he was in her memories. He used to be more lively and young looking. Now he looked as though his life was taken from his body and something artificial was put in return, and he looked older somehow.

She stared up at him. If she closed her eyes she could pretend. She could pretend he was still the dorky troublemaker who had the best intentions in mind she fell for.

Lotor glanced at the baby stroller before kissing his wife deeply. Her arms wrapped around his neck. He wrapped one arm around his waist, the other hand played in her short hair. She leaned into the kiss. Lotor chucked and broke the kiss. Pidge opened her eyes and stared up into the loving, yet lifeless orbs of her husband. She untangled her arms from his neck and stepped back.

“You’re so lovely, Kitten~” He smiled and kissed her cheek. KitKat began crying. Pidge jumped away from Lotor and ran over to their child.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Pidge asked picking KitKat up. She checked to see if the baby needs her diaper changed. Instead, KitKat reached towards her mother’s chest.  “Oh, you’re hungry, aren’t you?” Lotor wrapped his cape around Pidge’s shoulder blocking her from view while she fed KitKat. Pidge kissed her baby on the forehead. She hummed a lullaby while KitKat fed.

Lotor stared intently. He had such a lovely wife and such an adorable daughter. He couldn’t understand how his father let his mother become what she did. Lotor wrapped his arm around Pidge’s shoulders gently pulling her flush to his side. Pidge compliantly leaned on him, not wanting to disturb the feeding baby.

Pidge finally started burping the child. Lotor waited till she was finished to scoop them up and carry them back to their room. He’d order some servants to pick up the stroller later. For now, he wanted to spend time with his wife.

       He gently laid Pidge down on the bed as soon as he entered the room and took off his armor.

       “You don’t know what you do to me, Kitten,” Lotor said changing into more comfortable clothes. When he reached for their child Pidge instinctively flinched and held the infant closer. “Honey, hand me our baby.” When she refused Lotor sighed irritated and forcefully retrieved the child, careful not to harm her.  He gently placed KitKat down in her crib to sleep in the large walk-in-closet-turned-nursery. He quietly closed the door.

       Pidge stared at him frightened. As much as he used KitKat to manipulate Pidge, she knew as long as the baby was awake or near he wouldn’t try anything. Lotor tackled her onto the bed.

       “Now, let’s spend some quality ‘Husband and Wife’ time while the baby naps.” He ran his hand over her body. Pidge turned her face from him. Lotor used this as an opportunity to nip at her neck and jawline.

       “Please no…” Pidge cried. Lotor stopped.

       “What’s wrong?”

       “I…I’m… For humans, it’s not healthy to engage in… Activities like that so soon after we have baby…” Lotor climbed off Pidge understanding.

       “Alright, I wouldn’t want to hurt you.” She wanted so bad to point out the forming bruises on her arms. She wanted to mention the many times he got possessive and accidentally hit her head from throwing her onto things or into things. She wanted to yell at him, but she held her tong in fear. She had KitKat, her innocent little baby to worry about. She couldn’t risk KitKat in all of this. She could only try to figure out a way to escape with the baby.

       Lotor happily began gently caressing Pidge. He pulled her to his chest. She pushed him.

       “Not tonight…” Pidge mumbled.

       “Please, Katie? I just want to hold my wife.”

       “I don’t feel cuddly right now…” Lotor’s eyes narrowed.

       “You’re hiding something from me.”

       “It’s nothing.” He sat up and glared down at her.

       “Last time it was ‘nothing’ you tried running away with KitKat. In fact, you ran away with some traitors to the empire. The personally betrayed  _me._ Don’t think I’ve forgotten about that.”

       “Please drop it.”

       “I thought married couples didn’t hide secrets. Tell me, Kitten.” Pidge stayed silent. “Katie, I said to tell me what’s on your mind.” She turned onto her back to face away from him. Lotor grabbed her and flipped her back onto her back. “That was not a request!” He gripped her shoulder tightly. “Tell me!” Pidge ripped his hand off, neither missing the fabric the left with his hand. She started to try and get off the bed only to be pulled back forcefully into Lotor.

       “Let me go!” Pidge elbowed Lotor in the face. Lotor dropped Pidge onto the floor and held his nose. They heard KitKat crying in the next room. Pidge started scrambling to go comfort her child. Lotor swiftly stepped on her forcing her to stop. He drug her by the arm roughly to the bed. Pidge struggled hearing her baby cry.

       Lotor reached into a drawer and pulled out a pair of cuffs, and swiftly attached one of Pidge’s hands to the headboard. He smirked and went to comfort KitKat.

       “I know you want your mommy, little Angel, but mommy need’s some alone time. It’s ok.” Slowly the cries stopped and she heard Lotor returning. KitKat was cooing over toy’s in her crib and Lotor crossed his arms at his wife.

       “Give me my baby.”

       “You said this was  _my_  empire, so Kitora is  _my_ child and  _my_ heiress.” He closed the nursery door. “Keep in mind where we are. If you want to leave this marriage so badly go ahead and attempt to escape. You’ll be locked up for treason against the Galra Empire. You won’t ever get to see our child except when she needs to feed.” Pidge stared at Lotor in disbelief. “I’ll strip you of your title, leaving you just as my consort. Consort means you won’t get any say in what happens when I get urges. It means you’ll be stuck in a room warming my bed in exchange for food and water. You won’t get to see our child. Or any of our children should you get pregnant again.” He stood just out of reach. “You’ll be mine no matter what you do. So, you might as well enjoy your life, behave and get to see our daughter. And never try to hide anything from me or fight with me, Katie, because I have your life in my hands. I can make it as happy or miserable as I want.”

       Pidge was stunned into silence. Lotor smirked and closed the distance between them. He grabbed Pidge’s free hand and nuzzled the palm.

       “I do this because I love you. I hurt you because I care.” He slowly started to edge his way onto the bed. “I can’t stand the thought of you unhappy, but if it takes that to keep you safe then so be it.” Pidge tried not to cry. “I love you so much, Katie. I’ll give you some time to think about it, but I do hope you decide to stay here willingly as my Empress. We could be so happy here. You, me, and our little angel.”

       He was soon draped over her.

       “I love you so much, my lovely Empress, my gorgeous wife.” He started rambling off and just repeating the word ‘Mine’ lovingly.


	11. Mama Please Stop Crying I Can't Stand The Sound

        They looked like a happy family. The loving emperor, who was leading the Galra re-takeover of the universe. His caring wife, pregnant with her second child. An adorable two-year-old daughter always smiling. Lotor has a constant hand on his wife or daughter. He let planets govern themselves under him if they abided by his rules. He seemed like a fair ruler unless you knew what happened behind the scenes.

       Lotor was constantly telling his wife how much he loved her unless she stepped out of line. Then you wouldn’t see her for around a week, while Lotor carried their child to meetings. Sometimes you could hear sobbing coming from their room, very rarely was there yelling but it still happened.

       “Kitten, you know I hate doing this to you.” Lotor sounded honestly upset and apologetic. “But I do it because I love you.” Lotor opened the box in his hands and pulled out a high-tech choker. Pidge knew what it really was, a collar to keep her in check. “Come here and let’s try it on.” KitKat was playing in her room while Lotor dressed Pidge for the day.

       Pidge sat on Lotor’s lap as he fastened the choker around her neck. It was plain black with blinking, purple, pink, and green lights, and Lotor’s insignia dangling in light purple metal on front. It felt smoother and lighter than silk despite all the tech. Pidge felt he tied it tighter than it needed to be to prove his point.

She was his. She chose this life. But it was either this or be imprisoned in a room, never to get to see her children again.

She felt the metal charm graze her skin, as well as Lotor’s clawed fingers. Lotor patted her leg telling her to stand up while he chose something for her to wear.

She rested a hand on her stomach. It had become a nail in the coffin. She might have been able to escape with just KitKat, but two children? She would be forced to decide which one to take with her. It was something she couldn’t do. She also doubted this child would be the last. Lotor kept commenting on how he wanted a big family and how happy it made him to see Pidge pregnant with his child. There was no longer an escape from this life. She wondered if there ever was. She was doomed the minute he came back to life.

Lotor dressed her in a simple black maternity dress, he was so glad he kept all her maternity clothes from when she was pregnant with KitKat. He helped her put her shoes on. Pidge watched him as he went to go dress KitKat for the meeting.

KitKat run out of her room wearing a light purple dress with Lotor following behind her.

“Alright, KitKat, get into your stroller,” Lotor said watching her run to her mom. KitKat giggled after giving Pidge a hug. Lotor knelt and kissed Pidge’s stomach before nudging her over to the stroller. Pidge stopped, and a hand flew to her stomach. “What’s wrong?”

“Baby kicked.”

“Icky!” KitKat said. “I don’t wanna baby.” Pidge wanted to comfort her daughter and let her know that mama didn’t want another baby either. She kept quiet for fear of Lotor’s reaction

“But, KitKat, sweetheart, Daddy, and Mommy won’t always be there to give you company. If you have a baby brother or sister, you’ll never be lonely.” Lotor reasoned.

“But it kick-ded mama.”

“They were just saying hello.” Lotor strapped her into the stroller.

Pidge got used to the stares of the Commanders, the prisoners, and the servants. Only a few brave Commanders approached them.

“How is the little Princess doing today?” One struck up a conversation.

“Good!” KitKat answered enthusiastically.

       “And how about our Empress and the unborn heir?”

       “The baby is fine,” Pidge replied. Lotor growled and tugged Pidge tightly to his side. The pain of his claws digging into her arm was normal. Pidge took his hand on the stroller and placed it on her stomach. That seemed to calm him down enough to stop the growling. “Excuse me, Commander, but we really should get going. I’m afraid, I’m getting a bit fatigued.” Lotor kissed Pidge and let her start pushing the stroller. The commander watched the family leave and respectfully saluted.

       When they made it to the throne room Pidge sat down on the smaller throne obediently. Lotor placed their daughter in a playpen by the throne to play.

       “Now, Katie, I need you to stay calm.” He mumbled.

       “Why? About What?”

       “Bring in the prisoners!” Lotor sat down and grabbed ones of Pidge’s hands. Pidge froze. That couldn’t be right. They’d never let themselves be captured.

But there they were: Keith struggling and attempting to fight the sentry holding him, Allura refusing to let her head fall, Coran staring at the princess worried, Lance staring at Pidge in disbelief, Hunk hanging his head low, Shiro was knocked out, and Matt was fighting just as much as Keith. Pidge stood up to go and help her friends, past instincts kicking in. Lotor pulled her back. She ended up falling into his lap.

       “Lotor let them go!” Pidge begged. “Please, please,  _please_ , let them go.”

       “Calm down, Kitten.” Lotor kissed Pidge’s cheek. Pidge started crying.

       “Let my sister go!” Matt yelled managing to rip himself out of the sentry’s grip. He ran up and almost got to the throne. Pidge managed to get away from Lotor to and managed to meet with Matt half way. “It’s ok Pidge, I got you.”

       “Take KitKat out of the room till I call you back in,” Lotor ordered. Pidge’s filled the room as the Commander did as told and took the tiny child out of the room. KitKat stared at the Commander curious. Lotor marched over to the pair of siblings embracing on the floor. Matt was glaring at Lotor while holding his sister tightly. “Katie, stand up.”

       “Don’t call her that!” Matt screamed. Lotor took a deep breath and knelt behind Pidge.

       “Katie, come here.” Pidge flinched as soon as Lotor touched her shoulder. “Kitten, now.” Matt clung tighter to his sister.

       “Stay away from my sister!” Lotor ignored Matt.

       “Kathrine, I’m giving you the choice right now. Let go of Matt and I’ll let you choose what sentence each one of them gets out of the ones I’ve prepared. If you don’t…” Lotor stood started to charge a gun. Pidge separated from Matt just enough to see the gun pointed between her brother’s eyes. “Five, four, three, two-“ Pidge took the hand Lotor offered to her. She was shaking like a leaf. He shot the ground by Matt instead as a warning. Pidge was outwardly sobbing now. “Take KitKat and go back to our room. Do not utter a word of what happened in here, do you understand, Katie?” Pidge nodded and slowly walked out of the room.

       She retrieved KitKat from the Commander and walked as fast as she could to their room.

       Lotor smirked at them.

       “Take them to their holding cells, I’ll have their punishments tomorrow. Oh, and Matt, never try to take Pidge away from me again. You’re only alive right now because stress is bad for the baby.” Lotor marched back to his throne and pulled up the security feed in his privet quarters. Pidge sat on the bed gently rocking KitKat back and forth, not for the child’s comfort but her own.

       Sadly, KitKat was used to this. She was used to Daddy yelling at Mama. She was used to Mama crying. Not seeing Mama for a week. Daddy always told Mama how much he loved her though. He loved her so much that’s why he hurt her. That’s why Daddy made Mama cry. To protect Mama. To keep her safe.

       KitKat decided she needed to be as strong as Daddy so she could protect Mama and the Baby. She’d make sure the Baby would be protected. She’d make sure the Baby knew how to make Mama feel better and how to make Daddy proud.

       KitKat tugged at her Mama’s sleeve.

       “What is it, Angel?”

       “Baby!” Pidge sat her child down. KitKat did what she saw her Daddy do; kiss Mama’s belly.

       “No worry Mama, I gonna protect baby!” Pidge smiled down at her child.

       “I don’t doubt it.”


	12. The Worst Things in Life Come Free to Us

       Pidge cried into her pillow. She hadn’t left the room in a week. Not because Lotor locked her in. No. Because she had to give punishments to her friends.

       Allura, Matt, and Lance had ended up as servants on the ship. Hunk became an unwilling cook. Keith and Shiro ended up as guards to KitKat. While Coran was slated to become the child’s tutor.

       She did the best she could with the punishments Lotor gave her as options, even managed to persuade him to not using some bad ones.

       The door opened. Lotor was probably bringing her lunch. She felt a tiny weight come join her on the bed.

       “Mama, eat time.” KitKat’s tiny voice demanded. Pidge sat up.

       “Mama’s, not hungry KitKat.” Pidge lied.

       “Mama needs to eat for baby, right?” KitKat placed a bowl of food on Pidge’s stomach. No, not food. Green Food Goo. Pidge laughed at the substance, she also found a note on the spoon.

        _We don’t blame you ~Hunk_

       She smiled and started to eat.

       “KitKat, could you get a message to the cook who made this for me?” KitKat nodded, happy to see her mother smiling for the first time in a week. “Tell the cook ‘Thank You’ he really cheered me up.”

       “Okay Mama!” KitKat ate her own lunch. “What is this?”  
       “Food Goo, I used to eat this all the time when I flew Green to form Voltron.”  
       “Green? Voltron?” KitKat stared at Pidge wide-eyed.

       “That’s right, Mama and Daddy never told you how they met.” KitKat shook her head. “So, before I tell you how I met your Daddy, I need to tell you how Mama ended up in space.” Pidge began telling her daughter the about Voltron, the Legendary Defender. Starting with the Kerberos mission.

       That’s how Lotor found them. Pidge animatedly telling her adventures to their daughter.

       “Then Daddy blasted for the ship Keith was heading for and said-“

       “‘Hello Paladin’s and Rebel fighters, I think it’s time we’ve had a chat.’” Lotor finished. Pidge visibly flinched.

       “Daddy! I took-ed good care of Mama, today.”

       “Why don’t you go take a nap and I’ll take care of your Mama?” KitKat nodded and hugged Pidge’s belly before running to her room.

       “I might take a nap as well.” Pidge said.

       “You don’t want to try and take a walk around the ship?” Lotor slowly massaged her stomach.

       “I dealt with our energetic daughter all day. Her attempts to take care of me. She has the grace of her mother at that age, who has the grace of a baby Weblum.” Pidge explained. Lotor nodded.

       “Get some rest, Kitten. If KitKat wakes up, I’ll look after her.” Lotor kissed Pidge gently.

       The next day Pidge was wondering the halls while Lotor was watching KitKat during a meeting. She doesn’t know how she convinced him to let her go off on her own, but she did.

       The ship shook and Pidge fell onto the floor. That’s how Coran found her. She was clutching her stomach on the floor.

       “Number Five!” Coran ran over to her.

       “Coran, somethings wrong with the baby. I fell when the ship shook.”

       “PRINCESS! LANCE! MATT!” Pidge heard footsteps rapidly approach.

       “Pidge!” Matt ran to his sister’s side. Matt picked Pidge up and ran her to the infirmary.

       The druids were calm and took Pidge from her brother. Haggar instructed them to put her on the operating table. One if the druids left. Haggar looked over to Pidge.

       “We’ll have to remove the baby early.” Haggar said.

       “If it comes down to it, save the baby first!” Pidge ordered. Haggar nodded and put Pidge under anesthetize. Lotor managed to walk in as Haggar cut Pidge’s stomach open.

       “Lotor, your wife told us if we have to choose to save the child, do you share her sentiments?” Haggar asked as she operated.

       “Save Katie first, we’ll do what we can to save the child, but her life comes first.” Lotor said trained on his wife’s face.

       “You’d go against her wishes just to keep her prisoner!?” Matt screamed.

       “I’d rather have her alive and unhappy than dead.” Lotor gently kissed Pidge’s forehead. “Who found her?”  
       “I did, she told me she fell when the ship shook earlier,” Coran said. “I hope both her and the baby survive.”

       Haggar handed Lotor the newborn. Zarkon finally entered with KitKat after Haggar finished stitching Pidge’s stomach back together. Shiro and Keith not far behind with Hunk.

       “Is that, Baby?” KitKat asked. Pidge was starting to wake up.

       “Yes, it’s your baby brother KitKat.”

       “What’s baby’s name?”

       “Marmora.” Pidge’s voice was hoarse. Everyone stared at her. Lotor quickly handed the baby off to pidge. “Why isn’t he crying?” Pidge stared at her child: he was so much smaller than his sister was. Purple skin and a tuft of white hair along with red Altean markings. Tears ran down Pidge’s face and hit the child’s. “I-Is he dead?”

       “Oh, Kitten…” Lotor tried to comfort his wife. KitKat climbed onto the bed and stared at the bundle. KitKat hummed before lightly pinching the infant causing him to cry out. “KitKat!”

       “Baby wasn’t crying, and that made Mama cry.” Pidge’s tears turned from sadness to happiness.

       “He’s breathing!” Pidge kissed the newborn on his tiny forehead. The baby instantly calmed down. “My little Marmora.” Marmora’s pointed ears twitched.

       “Marmora is Baby’s name?” KitKat asked. Pidge nodded. KitKat smiled at the baby. “I protect you Marmora!”

       “You want to name him after that rebel group?” Lotor asked. Pidge broke her stare to meet Lotor’s.

       “Please, just let me have this…” Her eyes pleaded to keep the name. She looked ready to cry. Lotor sighed.

       “Marmora is a strong name for a strong child.” Pidge smiled down at the newborn and held him close.


	13. We Keep This Love in a Photograph, We Made These Memories For Ourselves

        Lotor came back to his privet room. Pidge lied there sleeping holding Marmora and KitKat close. In her lap was an old photo album. He picked the album up and looked on the page they were on.

           He paused. He barely remembered this photo. His hand shook as he removed the picture.

           When was the last time she genuinely smiled like that?    

           She was sitting by a pond on Olkarion, her feet in the water, wearing her old baggy shirt and shorts. She looked like she was in mid-laugh. She had flowers in her hair. He so clearly remembered that day.

            _“We are going on a vacation!” Allura announced. Pidge looked up from her laptop._

_“What’s a vacation?” Lotor asked. Pidge looked up at him like he was insane._

_“You’ve never had a vacation or a day off?”  
           “Does my exile count?”_

_“No… I’ll show you a proper vacation, Legolas!” Pidge ran off to gather things. Lotor looked at the other paladins who shrugged._

_The ‘vacation’ ended up being a week of days off on Olkarion. Pidge woke him up on the first day with some breakfast in bed._

_“Hunk didn’t have to do that,” Lotor said suspiciously poking the food. He knew none of the male paladins liked him._

_“Hunk didn’t. I cooked it.” Lotor blinked at the admission. He cautiously ate the food to discover it wasn’t terrible or poisoned. He drank the milk as well thanking Pidge for her hard work. Pidge then threw some of his casual clothes at him. It was ancient Altean Alchemist clothing. He quickly changed and followed the excited human out of the castle ship._

_Pidge led him out of the city to the forest. She made him carry a basket and blanket, while she carried a backpack full of a few items. Finally, they came to a pond. Pidge set out the blanket and pulled some items from her bag including a camera._

_“Say cheese!” Pidge shouted._

_“What’s cheese?” A flash went off blinding Lotor. Lotor blinked to clear his vision._

_“I’ll tell you later.” Pidge started giggling at the photo on her screen. “I’m keeping this.” Lotor looked over her shoulder at the picture._

_“Delete that immediately.”_

_“Never.”_

_“Delete it, Paladin!” Lotor tried to grab the camera but Pidge dodged giggling._

_“You gotta catch me first, Legolas.” Pidge ran off._

_He chased her for a good half hour before he finally caught her. Pidge was still laughing as he tackled her. Lotor scrambled off her and retrieved the camera._

_“Come on I brought lunch and some things to do.”_

_They sat down and played some board games Pidge brought. Pidge taught him some human road games. They ate lunch and took pictures of each other._

It still lingered in Lotor’s mind. He had wanted to kiss her so badly that day. He had wanted to pull her into him and never let go.

           Lotor slowly carried the children back to their room carfully, as to not wake them. Pidge was still fast asleep. He thought about how much she changed since he first met her. He cupped her face gently.

           Perhaps they were overdue for a vacation. They hadn’t really gone on one since before their wedding. They were going to go on another for their honeymoon but…

           Lotor kissed Pidge’s forehead and left the room. He needed to take her somewhere special. He wanted to see her smile again. He just needed to see her smile like that once more. Carefree and honest.

           Maybe a beach? No… Pidge burns easily. Even easier now that she hasn’t been in any sun for years. A snowy cabin for a weekend? Perhaps when the kids are old enough to take care of themselves. There had to be someplace where they could go.

           He approached his computer and just searched vacation. The answer popped up before him. It was perfect. He could treat his perfect wife like the Queen she was. There was even something for the kids to do. He began making the preparations immediately. He’d surprise Pidge with it when she woke. He was so excited.


	14. We've Made These Memories For Ourselves

      Lotor kissed Pidge as he cautiously left her in the care of the spa. Nobel’s from all over the Empire went here and no one has even returned with a scratch, so it was safe. He also gave a small guard to protect her. KitKat was getting their child package and Lotor was going to watch Marmora today.

           Pidge was having a hard time letting go of her children. KitKat had attached herself to Pidge’s leg and Marmora cried every time Lotor tried taking him.

           “KitKat, would you like Allura to go with you?” Pidge asked. She noticed how much the young girl admired the Former Princess. KitKat nodded. Allura exited the Galra ship and Pidge explained the situation to her knowledge.

           KitKat and Pidge were getting a spa day. KitKat was being stubborn, but she’d be willing to behave for Allura or Coran. Allura agreed to babysit the young girl for Pidge.

           “Are you sure I can’t take Marmora with me?” Pidge stared at the infant in her husband’s arms.

           “You need time to relax. I’m sure I can handle him for one day. Besides I haven’t had time to bond with my little Prince Marmora.”

           “So, what am I getting done?”  
           “The full package, a massage, mud bath, hot bath, sauna, haircut. The works.”

           “Haircut? How are we cutting my hair?” Pidge gently fiddled with her hair. It had grown allot since she had been a paladin. She had been meaning to cut it, but life had gotten… complicated.

           “However, you want, Kitten.” Lotor kissed her forehead. “I look forward to seeing how you get it cut.” Pidge looked up at him. Her heart melted. The way he looked at her. It was the same back then. For he looked at her like that when they shared their first kiss.

            _Lotor opened the door to the coalition meeting room. He marched over to Pidge holding flowers._

_“Excuse me, Green Paladin… Pidge, please allow me to take you out on a date!” Lotor was blushing hard. Pidge looked up from her laptop. She didn’t know how to respond so she nodded. “A-alright, I’ll pick you up from your room later. Wear something formal if you have anything.”_

_“Did Lotor just stutter?” Lance asked laughing. Pidge looked at the flowers Lotor left her._

_“You know those flowers have different meanings in Galran and Altean.” Allura said._

_“Is that so?”_

_“In Altea they mean first love. On Daibazaal they mean True Love.” Allura teased. Pidge blocked her own red face with the flowers._

_“Well I don’t have formal attire, so I can’t go.”_

_“I’ll fix that!” Allura dragged Pidge out of the room. While she didn’t completely trust Lotor she loved an excuse to dress Pidge up._

_Lotor stared at Pidge in surprise and aw. Pidge was wearing a formal altean gown. It was a Strapless fitted bodice with full floor length skirt.The base color was green with pink flowers seemingly blooming in bunches all over the length of the gown. Tiered chiffon skirt in different colored layers. A delicate beaded belt decorates the waistline._

_“Not going to lie, I expected to see you in a suit with a skirt…” Lotor mumbled. He was blushing. “N-not that you look bad! You look very lovely.”_

_“Thanks… You look nice too.” Pidge smiled at Lotor’s suit. It was probably one of the old altean clothing pieces Coran and Allura gave him._

_“Can I ask for a selfish request?”_

_“… You’ve never asked permission before. I’m curious why now?”_

_“Because I don’t want to get slapped. Or zapped. Or kicked. You’re pretty and pretty violent you know.” Pidge blushed._

_“So, what’s the request.”_

_“Can I kiss you?” Lotor smiled at her. It was so genuine. Pidge felt her heart skip a beat. “If not right now we can kiss when we return to our causal wear.”_

_“Lean down.” Pidge said. Lotor complied curiously._

_“Yes?” She wrapped her arms around his neck. She leaned up closing her eyes and kissed him gently. Lotor was caught off guard. He didn’t know where to put his hands. He closed his eyes as he returned the kiss, still unsure of what to do with his hands. Pidge broke the kiss._

_The just stared at each other for a few minutes._

_“Pidge?”_

_“What?”_

_“I think I love you. I hope that’s not weird.”_

_“It’s not weird, I think I love you too.”_

_“Cool.”_

_“Cool…”_

_“So, do you want to go on our date, or kiss again.”_

_“I’m curious on why we needed to dress up, so date.”_

           Pidge absentmindedly touched her lips. She hadn’t thought about their first kiss in so long. She was brought back to reality by the Spa staff asking her to change into a fluffy cream robe.

           She allowed herself to be lead around throughout everything. She didn’t really impute anything until they got to the haircut portion.

           “Your hair is so long and pretty, Empress.” One of the Staff complimented. “I hope you don’t cut too much.” A tablet with a bunch of Human haircut options was put in Pidge’s lap. Pidge scrolled through it for a few minutes before finding a hair style she always wanted to try when she was younger.

           “I’d like this one.”

           “A-are you sure?”

           “Yes please.” Pidge smiled as she heard the staff collect their tools. She wondered how everyone would react to her choice.


	15. We Push and Pull Like a Magnet Do, Although My Heart is Falling Too

      Lotor sighed as he tried to calm Marmora down. For some reason, he couldn’t get the baby to stop crying. The only time the child didn’t cry was when he was eating and sleeping. Lotor had to excuse himself from meetings from the child’s wails.

           “How does Katie do it?” Lotor asked. “You won’t stop crying.” As if on cue Marmora cried louder. “Does your diaper need changing?” Lotor sniffed. Nothing.

           Finally, Lotor sighed and let his hair out of the ponytail he had been keeping it in since KitKat was a baby. Marmora stopped crying almost immediately. The infant began playing with the white strands that matched his own.

           Lotor smiled. He stroked the red marked purple cheek of his son. Marmora stared up at his father’s white hair with gold eyes. He was so tiny. Lotor wondered if he himself was ever as small as his son.

           He had a few hours before he got to pick Pidge and KitKat up.

           Someone knocked on the door. Lotor stood up regally, or as regally as you could look holding a tiny baby.

           “You may enter.” Lotor stared at his own father questioningly.

           “I came to see my Grandson.”

           “And here I was hoping the witch would allow me to keep a secret.” Marmora stuck some of Lotor’s hair in his mouth. Lotor quickly responded. “No, no, no, Marmora, we don’t stick Daddy’s hair in our mouths.” Lotor sat Marmora into his baby carrier.

           “He’s a very tiny.” Zarkon observed.

           “So is my wife, and yet she managed to beat you.”

           “And then she was raped by you.” Lotor glared at Zarkon.

           “I could take you out myself father.”

           “I am merely stating the facts, she isn’t the Paladin she used to be.” Zarkon laughed darkly. “I guess that’s your fault, isn’t it,  _son_?”

           “Get out.” Lotor gritted his teeth.

           “Can’t handle the truth?”

           “GET OUT!” Marmora started crying from the outburst.  Lotor was shaking as Zarkon left the room.

           Lotor took a deep breath despite no longer having the need to. He’d never do anything to hurt Pidge. He loved her. He loved her with all his heart. She married him because she loved him too. She was so happy when they had KitKat, wasn’t she? All he wanted to do was protect her. Even if she was unhappy he was protecting her. That’s what mattered right?

           Marmora’s cries grew louder breaking Lotor out of his own mind.

           “Shhh… I’m so sorry.” Lotor lifted Marmora up into his arms. “It’s ok, just a little longer and we’ll go pick up your Mama and sissy.”

           In a few hours, he was waiting at the Spa entrance. KitKat ran out with Allura following behind her slowly.

           “Daddy, Daddy! They called me ‘little Princess’.”

           “You are a little Princess, sweet heart.”  
           “It smelled really nice in there. And they even let me get my nails painted.”

           “I’m glad you had fun, now let’s wait for Mommy.”

           “I wanna see Baby!”

           “KitKat, how many times do we have to tell you that the babies name is Marmora?” Lotor asked kneeling down to make it easier for KitKat to see her brother.

           “Baby looks like Daddy.”

           “Marmora does look a lot like Daddy~” Pidge said. Lotor looked up and stared in awe.

           Pidge had gotten herself an undercut, with the top of her hair being long enough to reach her cheek. Lotor walked up and ran his fingers through her hair to confirm that it was the same undercut on both sides. He fiddled with her hair with one hand and flipped it the other way on her head.

           “Did they mess up your hair Mommy?” KitKat asked.

           “No, this was a popular style on Mommy’s planet when she was younger.” Pidge smiled.

           “You look enchanting, Kitten.” Lotor embraced her with one arm.

           He handed Marmora off to Allura and instructed her to take the kids back to their room. Pidge stared at Lotor questioningly. He buried his other hand in her short hair.

           “Loto- Oh!” Lotor kissed along her exposed neck. He moved along her jaw. Kissed her lips. Like he was searching for something. Pidge was a little confused in his change in attitude. “You really like it that much?”

           “I think you look lovely no matter what.” Lotor kissed her once more on the lips before having her wrap her arms around his own. He stayed silent for a moment as he led her back to the ship. “Kitten?”

           “Hmmm?”

           “I-I… Never mind. Something my father said to get a rise out of me… I guess it stuck with me.”

           “What did he say?”

           “… He said I raped you.” Pidge froze.

           Sure she didn’t feel ready for kids when her and Lotor had them, but he never… He never made her do that against her will, at least sexually. When they made love it was one of the few times Pidge felt like everything was alright. That they hadn’t changed.

           She tugged on his arm and cupped his face.

           “You don’t believe him, do you?” Pidge asked. Lotor stared at her.

           “I’ve done so much to hurt you… I know it’s only to protect you, but…”

           “I think I’d know if you did something like that…” Pidge bit her lip as she chose her words. “Yes, these past few years have been rough on us… Yes… You’ve hurt me…” Pidge’s hand seemingly moved of its own accord to her scar. “I’ve been upset with you… With myself…” She locked eyes with Lotor. “But, whenever I told you I wasn’t ready to do something sexually you stopped.” Lotor searched her eyes for lies and found none. He did find traces of her being hurt by him and her being cautious, but no lies. “Lotor, I love you. And I’ll always love you. You’ll have to mess up big time for me not to love you.”

           “Katie…” Pidge smiled up at him. He hugged her tightly. “I love you. I love you so much, Kathrine. I’m scared of anything happening to you.”

           “It’s ok to be scared. I’m scared too… Of something happening to you… To the kids… Something worse happening to Matt…. Coran… The other Paladins…” She buried her face in his chest.  

           Speechless.

           Lotor was speechless. They hadn’t shared feelings like this in years. Since before they were married.

           Since simpler times. Since they were dating.

           They stood there like that for a few good minutes. Then Lotor quietly led Pidge back inside.

           He had to do something to make this all up to her. To prove his love. A vacation isn’t going to be enough.


	16. I'm About to Lose My Mind, You've Been Gone For so Long

        Lotor searched through old boxes filled with things from when Daibazaal was still thriving. He was glad most of Pidge’s cloths from being a Paladin still fit, but he needed to get her a few more items. He excitedly collected everything.

           On his way out he ordered a general to collect the Coalition servants on the ship and bring them to a certain room.

           Pidge sat reading the kids a naptime story. Lotor opened the door waking both children up. Pidge set to work getting them back to sleep, she shot Lotor a ‘this is your fault’ glare.

           “I’m so sorry, Katie.” Lotor picked up Marmora while Pidge got KitKat to go back to sleep. Lotor managed to lull Marmora and put him in the baby carriage with KitKat. “But I have a surprise for you!”

           “Surprise?” Pidge stared at him.

           “Here I have something for you to change into!” Lotor pulled something from the box he brought. “Well You have some choices, actually.”  
           “Old Altean and Galran Alchemist uniforms?”

           “Yes… You don’t have many science confirmative clothes that fit.”

           “Hey! I did some kick ass science in Matt’s hand me downs.” Pidge defended.

           “Please?”

           “Alright, but if this is some creepy Oedipus complex, I’m kicking your ass.” Lotor chuckled and kissed Pidge’s temple. She grabbed some black pant’s and boots and a blue and white Altean top. Lotor paused as Pidge picked up her choker; it had only been a few months and yet she had gotten used to wearing it. He wished he could convince himself to let her keep it off, but her attempt to leave him when she was pregnant with KitKat haunted him.

           The thought of her leaving them, with or without their children. He couldn’t go one without her. Without knowing she was safe. Without her being his. He’d rather die again then be without her.

           He tied fastened it around her neck and kissed her deeply on the lips.

           “You look so beautiful, Katie, I’m so happy to call you mine.” Pidge rolled her eyes. “I really am.”

           “Let’s go see that surprise.” Pidge pushed the stroller and followed Lotor to what she thought was an unused research room. Lotor smiled and opened the door.

           Everyone was standing in a mix of Altean and Galra cloths just like she was and were looking through files, both physical and digitool. Matt and Hunk were even working on what looked like a playpen for the kids with a Robonanny.

           “What’s going on here?” Pidge looked at Lotor.

           “Well I know you’ve been bored at meetings, and you probably don’t like being cooped up in our room all day, so I decided to let you do some research to keep you occupied.” Lotor explained with a smile. “Well… To pick up on old research, I do have to put limitations on somethings. Both to protect you and the empire.”

           “Lotor I…” Pidge was speechless. Lotor smiled and nuzzled into her hair. She pulled him down by his shoulders to kiss him. “Thank you!” Lotor wrapped his arms around her, pulling her tightly to him.

           “As much as I’d love to hold you all day and never let go, I have work to attend to.” Lotor gave her one last squeeze. “I’ll be back later to pick you and the kids up. I love you.”  
           “I love you too.” Pidge watched Lotor leave, before she turned to the others. They were all staring at her, but she couldn’t place the emotion.

           “How could you love that monster after everything he’d done to us, Pidge? Everything he’d done to you?!” Matt yelled. Pidge stood in stunned silence. “You said it yourself, he was a changed person the moment he came back to life. So why? How can you let yourself stay in love with a guy like that?!”

           “I don’t know Matt…” Pidge sounded broken. “I don’t know. I know I should hate him for everything he’s done to me, to everyone I care about. I should hate him.”          

           “Matt, calm down.” Shiro shouted. Pidge was frozen in place.

           KitKat kept her eyes closed as the adults argued, pretending to be asleep.

           Why was Uncle Matt making Mama cry?

           The small girl wrapped her hand around her brothers. She’d never make Marmora cry like that.

           “He’s the one who locked you in your room! To convince you to leave with him! He forced you into having KitKat! He forced you into having Marmora!” Matt was steadily getting closer to his sister. “How can you love that monster!? He wanted us all dead!”

           “I don’t know…” Pidge wrapped her arms around herself. “Every single time I start to hate him… He does something that reminds me of the old him… The one I feel in love with… He smiles like he used to, or I see the light back in his eyes. He make’s those dumb jokes we did when we were dating and I… I fall in love all over again.” She began to smile, but it was sad and broken. “Sure, I didn’t feel ready to have KitKat or Marmora when I became pregnant, but as soon as they were born I was so happy to have them in my arms.”

           Everyone was silent. Matt stared at his sister.

           Why did it have to be her?

           Why Pidge?  
           Out of any girl in the universe, why his baby sister?

           Why did Lotor decide he wanted Pidge?

           Why did he break her so badly she couldn’t even be sure of her own feelings?

           Matt sighed, he shouldn’t be yelling at Pidge for this. If it hadn’t been for her both Shiro and Himself would be back in the gladiator ring.  He wrapped his arms around his sister and let her cry into him.

           This wasn’t her fault it was  _his._ Prince, no, Emperor Lotor. He broke Pidge. He’s the one who made her have children she wasn’t ready for.

           Lotor used to care for Pidge so much. The idiot used to bend over backwards just to see Pidge smile or make her laugh. He would get this dumb lovestruck smile whenever he looked at her.

           What changed? Why did it change?

           Matt held his sister close to his chest glad her children were taking a nap.

           KitKat learned the situation her family was in, too young to understand, but old enough to realize her family wasn’t perfect. The young girl decided then that Marmora, or any other siblings she may get in the future wouldn’t find out the truth she did.


	17. Technically Our Marriage is Saved

      _She was so beautiful. So ethereal, Lotor debated picking her up and running off with her before any press could snag a picture of his lovely bride._

_How could he be so lucky? He got the smartest, bravest, cutest creature in the Universe. Everything was perfect._

_Until it wasn’t._

_He was simply staring at her when he saw it. A telling red dot, aiming to kill. He knew people were against the marriage, but would they really go as far as to kill her right when he was happiest?_

_Lotor’s mind was racing. He had to act fast._

_He tackled her, making sure her head was shielded from the ground and the shot._

_The pain in his hand was nothing compared to that in his back and chest._

_“Lotor?” Pidge’s voice sounded dazed, and small, and yet she was calling out to him._

_“Are you alright, Katie?” He had to know. He had to know if she was ok. “Kathrine, please answer me.”_

_“I-I’m fine, what about you?” He smiled at her. He felt the life draining out of him, but he couldn’t let her last memory of him be him not smiling. “Lotor what just happened?” He struggled to smile at her, gently caressing her face. “Lotor, answer me!” Their lips met. Lotor knew it would be their last. If he was to face death then he’d do it with no regrets._

_“I love you, Katie. Never forget that.” His vision was starting to fade. He could hear Pidge calling out for him, begging him to hold on._

_Pain. Pain is all he felt. Then nothing. He floated in nothing for so long._

_Was this death?_

_Would he ever learn if his darling Kitten survived?_

_Ache._

_An ache filled his chest at the thought of his love dead. The thought that he might have failed. That perhaps she did the same thing he did: put on a brave face. He wished he could’ve seen her smile once more_

_He felt something enfold him. It felt wet, but warm._

_Not like the warmth him and Pidge shared at night._

_It wasn’t comforting at all._

_Suddenly he was staring at the celling of a lab. He finally noticed he was naked in a bath of quintessence._

_How was he alive?  
           Why was he alive?  _

_Druids stared at him, along with his father and the witch. Where was Pidge? Where was Katie?_

_“Katie?!” Was she dead._

_He felt tears run down his face. Pain worse than the one that caused his death fill his chest._

_Did he lose her? The only one who could make him happy._

_“Where is she?” Lotor desperately searched for answers. “Is… Is she dead?”_

_They wouldn’t bring him back without her, would they?_

_“Unfortunately, the Green Paladin is still alive.” Zarkon’s voice rang out. Lotor felt relief flood his system._

_“Then where is she?”_

_“With her fellow Paladin’s mourning your death.”_

_“But I’m right here, I’m alive.”  
           “You are now, but you most certainly died.” Haggar explained. “We brought you back to make a deal.”_

_“Like I’d trust you witch.”_

_“So, you’d rather die again? I guess you wouldn’t have to wait long for your wife. The assassin group won’t be happy until she’s dead.” Lotor went to attack her, but stopped as druids pushed him back down into quintessence. “We want the Galaxy reclaimed for the Empire, Voltron and all. If you want to be able to return and protect that Paladin you hold dear then you will do as we say.”_

_Lotor thought through his options._

_He’d do anything to keep her safe, his darling Pidge. Even if it meant becoming his father. All he needed was Pidge to be safe in his arms. He’d destroy everything if that’s what had to happen._

_“I agree to your terms, now when can I see my wife?”_

_“In do time, but first we need to go over some plans.” Zarkon ordered._

           Lotor opened his eyes.

           He hadn’t slept or dreamed in ages.

           Why would he dream of his rebirth?

           He sleepily raised a hand to play with his wife’s hair, as she laid sleeping with her head on his chest. He sighed as he felt her breath rise and fall against him.

           His dear little wife… He understood his parent’s desperation to save each other now. He’d do anything to keep her safe.

           He’d give her the universe. Or destroy it if she asked. If that’s what it took to keep her in his arms unharmed. Even if he never saw her smile again. If he had to lock her away from everything and everyone. All he needed was Pidge by his side.

           Forever.

           Her tiny snore broke his thoughts. He placed a hand on her stomach.

           Lotor was well aware, when the children grow old enough she may take them and leave. He had a solution. It wasn’t his proudest thought… But if it took keeping Pidge in a cycle of pregnancy so she wouldn’t leave him… He’d do it.

           Besides, she looked so cute when she was pregnant with his child. With her stomach bulging out gently. He was surprised at how compatible their biology has been so far. Both times the had been truly trying for children they were rewarded for their efforts.

           Lotor gently kissed the top of Pidge’s head. She nuzzled his chest, her arms tightening around Lotor’s waist. Her legs practically hugging on of his own.

Was she cold? She was wearing one of his old ‘sleep’ shirts as a nigh gown and a pair of his sleep pants rolled up to fit on her tiny frame. She had gotten into the habit her first pregnancy, and never really stopped. The thin alien silk-like-satin sheets weren’t doing much to protect her from the freezing air of the Galra ship. He himself wasn’t going to be able to warm her up, even if the incident causing his rebirth never happened Galra just naturally were colder than humans.

He heard the door open. He watched KitKat walk in, blanket and plush lion in hand. She had requested her own room after his surprise to Pidge, though in the middle of the night she would almost always return to the nursery to sleep with Marmora, or climb into bed with him and Pidge if she had a bad dream.

Lotor also noticed his daughter stopped with the requests to see ‘Uncle Mattie’, instead saying now she’d rather attend meetings with him rather than play with ‘Uncle Matt’. She learned something she shouldn’t have learned. He could tell in her eyes. They matched her mothers.

They looked just liked Pidge’s when Lotor first met her. So full of youth. And pain and knowledge. Knowledge of things you should never find out at young ages, and pain of having your world shatter around you.

Those same eyes were now on his three-year-old daughter and neither him or Pidge knew why.

Today was a day where she went straight to Marmora’s room.


	18. I'd Lie

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pidge wakes up in a strange place, to a seemingly impossible opportunity

_Alone._

_She was alone in a dark abyss. Two lights on either side in a far distance. A warm green light called out to her. She wanted to go to that light with all her heart, but she was being pulled from it, far from it to the other light. It was purple, a color she used to adore as a child. At one point that adoration was replaced with anger and resentment, then she came to love it again only to fear it._

_Pidge curled in on herself._

_She wanted Green, she wanted Earth. She wanted to be surrounded by her fellow paladins and space family._

_As the purple light pulled her closer. She wanted to cry, that light hadn’t been the same for a while now._

_Then all the sudden everything was dark. Nothing surrounded her, it felt like she couldn’t breathe._

            Pidge woke up suddenly to the sound of dripping and Marmora crying. She looked around.

            She was in some sort of holding cell. She heard her daughter’s screams.

            “KitKat! Kitora! Answer me!” Pidge noticed a crib not far from her cell Marmora was wailing. A Galra approached the crib, lifted Mamora out of it and rocked him until he fell back asleep. She pounded her fists on the force field.

            “Shut up.” The Guard said gruffly.

            “Where’s my daughter?!”

            “The brat is being shown to her future husband. We can’t have the future of the empire rely on a Quarter bred mutt.” The Galra said. Pidge pounded on the wall even harder.

            “Give me my daughter!” the Guard growled at her. Pidge flipped him off. “I took down Zarkon, you’re an ant compared to him,” Pidge growled.

            “And Emperor Lotor took you down. You haven’t fought in years.” The Galra laughed at her. Pidge glared. “Here’s a deal, you divorce the Emperor and leave our empire, and we’ll leave you and your children alone.” Her laugh caught him off guard.

            “If it was that easy do you think I’d still be here?” Pidge asked. “Your Emperor isn’t the man I married! He locks me up and threatens the children he forced me to have! I am not with the tyrant because I want to be!”

            “Then run away.”

            “I tried, before I had KitKat, I escaped and I ran away. I was almost happy. I was almost with my friends again and then at the last second Lotor showed up.”  Pidge glared. “I could care less about this ruined empire! All I want is to keep my kids safe.”

            “Leave the kingdom and never come back. We’ll give you a ship. Take you quarter breed children and get out of here.” The Guard said. “The Emperor will take a new wife.” The Guard bundled Marmora up.

            “Thank you…” Pidge said. “But I’m not leaving my daughter.” The Guard nodded, Pidge heard muffled voices on the other end and a female Galra left the room, holding KitKat’s hand.

            “My brother said you two struck a deal.”

            “I’ll leave and never return to this Empire, all I need is my children some supplies and a ship.”

            “When I become the Emperor's new wife, I’ll make sure your planet is safe.” The Galra said. Pidge ran over to her daughter.

            “Mama? Where’s Daddy?” KitKat looked around concerned.

            “Sweetheart, we’re going on a trip. Just you, me, and Marmora.”

            “What about Daddy?” KitKat stared confused.

            “Daddy… Has to run the Empire.” Pidge couldn’t tell her the truth. Her daughter looked at the smiling Guard and the Lady who claimed KitKat was the cutest princess she’d ever seen.

            “Okay, but only to protect Marmora.” KitKat said taking her mother’s hand.

            “That’s my girl.”

           

 

            Lotor returned to his room excited to see his dearest after a long day. The first thing he noticed was the broken pad on the wall, it had been dismantled and tampered with. The next thing was the door had been pried open and shut again. He threw open the broken door.

            The room looked untouched. He tore the covers off the bed hoping Pidge just hadn’t moved from bed.

            He ran into the nursery, maybe Marmora had been hungry. The crib laid toppled over, KitKat favorite toy Lion left on the floor of the room, dropped.

            “No… Pidge?! Darling! Are you hiding? Please tell me you’re playing a game with the children!” Lotor shouted, tearing the room apart.

            He screamed with rage and grief. Soon running to his daughter’s room to search and make a mess of.

            They were gone.

            Somebody took his wife and children.  The most important things in the universe to him.

           

            He collapsed onto the floor.

            “Sire?” A Female voice.

            “WHAT?! You want to let me know how security didn’t catch someone taking my wife!?” The Galra stepped back frightened. “You want to tell me how someone managed to run off with my children!?”

            This was not the plan. He was supposed to think Pidge was dead.

            “Perhaps it’s time to get a new wife, a galra wife,” Lotor growled and grabbed the Galra by the throat.

            “No! I want her! She’s the only wife I’ll ever take!” Lotor threw the Galra. “I want the entire security team replaced and made an example of. I will not stand for failure, especially when it comes to my wife’s safety!”

            “She… She ran away sire.” The Galra assumed it was better to come clean now, so they didn’t die. Lotor nodded his face went frighteningly neutral.

            “She’s wearing a tracker.” His voice sounded empty. “She’d take the children with her where ever she decided to go.” He started walking to the bridge. “Kathrine will regret this… I assume you knew about this.” Lotor wasn’t even facing the Galra. “How else would you have known she ran? For your honesty, your death will be quick.”

            Pidge was going to pay for what she had done. Lotor took a deep breath to calm down. Galra jumped out of his way.

            “Move the nursery, I want the entire security team executed and replaced.” Lotor began ordering. “My wife’s title is now longer Empress. She is a traitor whose only use is warming my bed and giving me heirs! Throw her friends into the arena! Find Earth and enslave all its people!” Quickly Galra got to work not wanting to join the former security team.

           

            Pidge felt a shiver run down her spine. She hoped she was far enough from the main fleet to escape her husband.

            No.

            Lotor hadn’t been her husband for years. He had been her captor, her enslaver, her jailer, and her abuser. He was nothing like the kind Half-Altean Half-Galra she fell in love with.

            She sighed and glanced at her children. Marmora sleeping in a makeshift car seat, and KitKat wondering around the ship.

            “Mama, do you love Daddy?”

            “I-“

            “You love me and Marmora as much as you love Daddy.”

            “… I love you two more.” Pidge put the ship on autopilot. “You’re my little kitten, sweeter than any chocolate or treat.” She picked KitKat up and sat the child down in her own lap.

            “What about Marmora?”

            “He’s my little Prince. I can already tell he is going to have a huge heart and be a kind soul.” Pidge walked over and kissed Marmora’s forehead.

            “How can you tell?”

            “Mother’s intuition.” Pidge kissed her daughter’s cheek. “Just like how I know you’re going to grow up to be the prettiest princess in the universe.”

            “… You promise?”

            “I promise.”

            At that moment the ship shook. It woke Marmora. Pidge sat KitKat down and buckled her seatbelt. The ship shook again.

            “Stay put sweetheart! Mama will get us out of here.”

            “Mama! Marmora’s crying!”

            “I promise to help Marmora as soon as I get us out of here!” Another shot hit the ship.

            “Mommy!” KitKat cried unbuckling her belt. “Marmora needs us!”

            “We have to get out of here first KitKat! Get back in your chair!” Pidge had to get them out of here fast, but she couldn’t do it without hurting KitKat if she didn’t sit down. The ship shook again, Pidge caught KitKat before the child could hit the ground.  The ship lost power.

            “Mama, it got dark…” KitKat held tightly onto her mother, Pidge hurriedly grabbed Marmora and hid under the ship's console.

            “I know it’s dark, but we have to be quiet, ok? It’s a game. A game of hide and seek.” Pidge whispered.

            “A game?”

            “No matter what you must be quiet.” Pidge rocked Marmora back into complacency. “And Help me keep Marmora quiet.”

            “Can I hold him?” KitKat asked. Pidge nodded.

            “Of course… Mind his head.” KitKat smiled at her mother as she handed over her brother, being extra careful. Marmora immediately started playing with his sister’s hair.

            Pidge smiled at the moment between her kids. It was sweet, even if the reason was she’d be able to fight easier without holding onto a child. The door opened. Pidge signaled KitKat to be as quiet as possible.

            “Katie? Are you in here?” Lotor’s voice carried through the ship. “Please, I’m just worried about the kids.”

            “Daddy?” KitKat wanted to run to her father, but Pidge winked.

            “Don’t forget the game, Daddy has to find us on his own.” Pidge smiled the best she could. “Even if he finds me, you gotta beat him in this game.” KitKat nodded.

            “Don’t be difficult. Come out and tell me where the children are and everything will be easier on you.” Lotor started wrecking the ship. Pidge held the children close to her chest. “Pidge, I’ll e-x-e-c-u-t-e your former friends if you don’t.” He wondered the ship. “That Earth you love so much will be no more.”

            He growled. This wasn’t working. He took his sword and scratched it on the floor, causing a piercing sound.

            Marmora started crying. KitKat stared at her brother worried.

            “Kitora? Where’s my little girl? Daddy need’s to cheer up his favorite little Prince.” Lotor called out.

            “KitKat remember our game?” Pidge whispered.

            “But Marmora need’s Daddy.” KitKat whined.

            “KitKat, no!” KitKat wriggled out of her mother’s grasp and ran over to her father.

            “Daddy! He keeps crying and Mama keeps ignoring him!” Lotor picked the small girl up.

            “Don’t worry we’ll make sure that’s never a problem again.” He kneeled to her. “Where’s Mama hiding?” Lotor picked up Marmora and started rocking him before handing the child to a Druid. “Take them to the new nursery. I need to handle their mother.” The druid nodded leading the Princess away.

 

            Pidge stayed under the console panicking. She had to go back for her kids.

            “Come out now and I might let you see our children again.” Lotor lied. “Kitten I need you. The children need you.” He walked over to the console. “I know your there, love.” He kneeled and looked under, directly at Pidge. “Found you.” He grabbed her by the arm.

            “Let go of me!” Pidge stayed put.

            “You haven’t seen battle or training in 3 years. I’ve been training every single day.” Lotor dragged her out roughly by her arm. “You haven’t been eating correctly, sitting in bed feeling sorry for yourself.” He forced her to sit down on a chair. “You’re my beautiful wife, who sits in the lap of luxury.” Pidge struggled against his grip.

            She couldn’t deny he was right. She hadn’t worked out in years. In theory, she could still fight, but in practice, she was probably outmatched.

            “Look at you.” Lotor cupped her face, ignoring her protests and struggles. “So beautiful.” He kissed her cheek. “Even if you are a traitorous betrayer.” He took out handcuffs. Pidge tried to stand up only for Lotor to push her back. “You’ve done so well these past years, haven’t tried to escape once.” He spun her around cuffing her hands together. “I let you dress how you wanted. Cut your hair how you wanted. I gave you free wondering about the ship, I didn’t kill your former friends… And yet you betrayed me.”

            “Lotor, think about what you're doing.” Pidge tried to reason.

            “I am.” Lotor picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. “I realize why my Father did what he did…” Lotor carried her to a room she’d never been in before. “He loved my mother so much he was willing to risk everything.” He walked through the large room, to the bed. The room was filled with nothing but pillows, blankets, and drapes. It set a certain mood. “I never understood why he did that until I met you.” He laid Pidge on the bed. “If you ever left my side for good, I’d destroy the universe to get you back.”

            “Lotor no!” Pidge cried as Lotor uncuffed her. “Please don’t do this!”

            “I love you too much to take the risk of you leaving me again.” Lotor smiled sadly at her. “I have stripped you of your royal title. You have no authority or freedom. I’m afraid to say you’ll be confined to this room.”

            “Lotor, please!” Pidge’s mind raced to save herself.

            “You’re so pretty when you beg.” He smiled. “I’ll make sure you aren’t lonely! You’ll have me, and we’ll have many, many children. I’ll bring the children to you, so you can feed them… I’ll have to limit your time with them after they reach a certain age.” He kneeled by Pidge’s side forcing her down into the sheet’s slowly pulling at her clothes. “I know it will be hard-“

            “Lotor, please, I love you and I know you love me.” Pidge lied. “You know this is the wrong thing to do.”

            “How I wish I could believe your words.” Lotor lamented.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it took so long to get this chapter out, I had to have rewritten it at least 10 times before I was happy with the direction it was going and sending the story. I'll try to be better about getting chapters out in the future, but we should be starting to build up to the end here soon. I'm not sure how many more chapters this story will go for, so bear with me!


	19. I say damn your kiss and the awful things you do

            The door cracked open, not quite letting the light in due to the sheer curtains. Pidge couldn’t tell the reason Lotor entered the room. She had long lost track of time. He brushed past the curtains, which to Pidge were more like bars on a cage.

            “There you are.” Pidge hated how he made it sound as if she could be anywhere else. “Hello, my love.” She didn’t answer him. It was one of the few acts of rebellion she could do. “Katie don’t tell me you’re still upset about Marmora being taken away, he had been breast feeding for too long. She curled in on herself in response. “Don’t give me the silent treatment.”

            Soon he was forcing her to sit up and drink some of the liquid he brought.

            “When will I see them next?” Pidge asked, her voice was scratchy and horse. It was from both under use over the past, on what she assumed to be, hours, and the screaming and moaning in pleasure from the previous night.

            “In a few weeks.” She didn’t know why she asked, she had no way of telling time here.  Lotor smiled and held her to his chest. “How are you feeling?”

            “Sore.” Pidge mumbled.

            “Where?” Lotor started massaging her legs.

            “Where the quiznak do you think?” Pidge spat weakly.

            “You’re wasting away in here, my love.” His tone was gentle and concerning.

            “Whose fault it that?”

            “Your own.” Lotor’s voice grew stern. “I warned you if you attempted to escape me I’d cage you to my room, and to a bed.” Pidge didn’t respond instead choosing to focus on the red drapes. 

            She felt her eyes grow heavy, staying awake was getting hard without Marmora to feed. The room was always dimly lit.

            “Finish your nutrients drink.” Lotor held the bottle to her lips.

            She had to drink every drop of quintessence she could. It was the only way for Lotor to keep her by his side.

            If he hadn’t started giving her quintessence he knew she would have died within the first month of being shut away. She had given up the will to live. He didn’t know how else to help his withering wife.

            She was none the wiser though. He kept her food well disguised if they had quintessence.

            “Please love grace me with you voice.” Lotor asked. It was his only indication the quintessence was working. He could watch her breath while she slept, but when she was awake she was like a broken doll, staring off into space.

            It hurt when she’d stay silent. It hurt when she would choose to mentally be anywhere else than by his side, but her thoughts were the only thing he’d never try to control. She’d no longer be his wife.

            Even if she was a broken soldier, she was still his wife. Even if that fire in her barley burned anymore, she was still his wife. Even if she despised him, she was still his wife. The Paladin who stole his heart.

            “How would you like another baby?” Lotor asked, resting his hand on her stomach.

            “What?” Pidge stared at him confused. “You want to bring another child into this mess that is our family?”

            “We are not a mess.”

            “How can you say that?” She tried sitting up on her own. She didn’t know if her body could even withstand a child even if she wanted one. She was barley living. “KitKat and Marmora will already grow up not knowing me. Another child would just hurt more to be separated from.”

            “It could give us a second chance to rekindle our love.” Lotor begged.

            “KitKat _was_ our second chance, Lotor.” Pidge’s voice cracked. “I was a fool to give into that demand. If I had just stood my ground then and told you no then the kids wouldn’t be living in this hell hole with no hope of escape, like me.”

            “Katie, please.”

            “I wish you wouldn’t call me by those names.” His heart shattered at her words. “ ‘Katie’, ‘Pidge’, ‘Kathrine’, those names are just proof I once had freedom, that I was more than a pet for you to play with.” He intertwined their hands, noting she no longer made the effort to please him with that. “I used to be Pidge, I used to be a Paladin of Voltron. I fell in love with an Amazing man who loved me more than all the power in the world.” She was starting to cry. “I used to actually love you. I should have died that day, not you.”

            “Don’t say that!”

            “They were aiming for me, and the real you died that moment you stopped moving in my arms.”

            “No, I didn’t, I’m right here. I came back to you, for you.”

            “Look at us, Lotor.” Pidge nodded to their surroundings. “You claim to love me, yet you destroyed everything I ever cared about. You take my freedom and hide me away only to try and makes things better by sleeping with me whenever you have a moment to spare from ruling your cursed kingdom, or raising our children alone.”

            “I didn’t destroy everything.”

            “I no longer have a planet to go home to.”

            “Earth sti-“

            “My brother, and my friends are no more.”

            “They-“

            “I barely see my children.”

            “You have me! That should be enough!” Pidge felt crushed against his cool armor. “I should be enough; the kids are just a bonus to being by my side.”

            “Lotor, that’s not how it works.”

            “I can prove it, let me prove, I’m all you need, just like your all I need.”

            “Lo-HMPF!” Lotor’s lips crashed against hers as he lower and pinned her to the sheets. He held her wrists with one hand, only releasing her from the kiss to catch her breath. Pidge stared at him frightened and terrified.

            “I’ll prove, I’m all you’ll ever need. Just stay by my side until the universe ends.”

            “You’re insane.”

            “Because of you.”


	20. taste you on my lips and I can't get rid of you

Lotor sighed heading back to his room. He opened the door and started removing his armor.

            “Love, I’m back.” Lotor announced. He looked toward the draped bed. He heard shuffling. “Are you awake?” Lotor pushed back the drapes.

            Pidge winced from the unfiltered light before flopping back down onto the bed.

            “So, what did the test say?”

            “Positive.”

            “We’re having another child?” Lotor stared at her.

            “We don’t have to…” Pidge held her stomach. Another baby meant more heart break.

            “Another child, a fresh start.” Lotor kissed her. She blinked.

            “Fresh start? You’ll let me out?” Pidge stared at him hopeful. “You’re being serious?”

            Lotor chuckled and gave her a kiss.

            “Look at me.” Lotor cupped her face. He whipped the tears of joy from her face. “I love you so much.” Pidge put her hand on one of his. He held her close.

            It almost broke his heart to crush her hopes.

            “Which is why you can’t leave this room.” Lotor let his hands fall with hers. She looked away from him, toward the bed directly below them. “Hey, don’t make that face.” Pidge didn’t meet his gaze instead choosing to cry into his chest. “I know you’re tired of being cooped up, but it’s for the best.” He gently rubbed her back.

            She shouldn’t have gotten her hopes up. She’s never leaving this room, not as long as Lotor’s alive. She felt Lotor’s hand graze her stomach.

            “I hate you.” Pidge mumbled. She felt Lotor tense and freeze.

            _Did I say that allowed?_  Pidge pried herself from Lotor’s chest to see what his reaction was.

            He looked heart broken, yet angry. He looked as if she had died and he was ready to give up on life, yet he wanted her dead.

            “Lotor I didn’t mean it, I just…” He held his hand up to cut her off. He stood up and got redressed in his armor. Then he just left.

            Pidge sat in silence for a bit. She got out of bed and walked over to the door, only to realize he didn’t lock it.

            She ran to the dresser and grabbed an oversized shirt, and sweatpants.

            She paused when she got to the door again. If she left who knows how Lotor would react, especially after what she told Lotor.

            Despite her worries she opened the door.

 

            Lotor has gone back to his throne to think. Had Pidge truly grown to hate him? Did she truly no longer love him? Would she run from him again?

            His heart hurt. He could still feel her lips on his. She was an addiction he’d happily continue… But what could he do when she no longer cared for him at all?

            In the moment she said she hated him he thought of killing her.

            Throwing her onto the ground. Kicking and hitting her until she stopped fighting. Letting bruises ruin her skin. Not stopping his rage until she stopped moving.

            He felt sick to his stomach. He never thought of hurting her like that before. He had been willing to risk the life inside her as well.

            Lotor let out a sigh. He was worse than his father. Closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose, Lotor sighed.

            “Lotor?” He bolted up.

            There stood Pidge, in front of him. She was wearing one of his old t-shirts, and some sleep pants he never wore. Her hair was tied back into the tiniest pony-tale he had ever seen.

            She stared at him with concern and worry. He wasn’t sure if it was for him or herself.

            “I’m sorry for leaving the room. You forgot to lock the door when you left, and you were acting weird and…” Lotor stood up catching the rambling woman’s attention. “I…  I know you want me to stay put, but I had to check on you.”

            All his anger and aggression faded. She had sought him out.

            “You came directly to me, so I can forgive you.” He met her at the base of his thrones steps. He lifted her chin up. Pidge gave him a nervous smile. “Do you really hate me?”

            “I was upset, and I was angry…”

            “Just answer yes or no.”

            Silence. Pidge sighed. She wasn’t sure if he wanted honesty.

            “Do you want my honesty?” Lotor nodded. “I don’t know. I still love you and I love our kids, but… You’ve change so much from the man I married, that you aren’t yourself anymore. And I hate who you’ve become.”

            Lotor nodded silently at her admission. He let go of her.

            “I understand.” He simply said. His tone wasn’t cold, but it didn’t hold the affection toward her she was used to. “Return to our room please, we will talk about this later.”

            “Alright.” Lotor grabbed her wrist before she started walking off. He kissed her deeply.

            “I just want you to know, I love you so, so, so much. And nothing will ever change that.” Pidge stared at him searching for a lie. Lotor wished she would smile. Or Anything.

            She didn’t smile.

            She didn’t nod.

            He could see she heard his words, and saw the truth behind them, but he knew she didn’t acknowledge them.

            She didn’t even tell him she loved him back.

            She just stared at him silently. As if he was a ticking time bomb, and she was looking for the right way to defuse him.

            “Never forget, you are my universe.” Pidge wrapped her arms around his neck. Lotor blinked as Pidge places her lips on his in response to his words.

            “I’ll try not to.” Pidge mumbled. She untangled herself from him. “Can I visit the kids on my way back?”

            “Just go back, no detours.” Pidge tried not to cry at his answer. She walked slowly back to the room.

            If she had known where the kids were she would have visited anyways but she barley figured out the way to the throne room from her gilded cage.

            She still loved Lotor to some degree, but he kept testing that love.

            She yawned as the room started to grow black. She fainted in the hall without warning.

            She could hear shouting in the distance.

            Pidge barley opened her eyes.

            _Lotor?_

            He looked so young, when did he cut his hair?

            Pidge was filled with questions as she collapsed.

           

            Marmora stared at the woman on the ground. She looked like KitKat but older.

            Speaking of KitKat, she was shouting for servants. She was panicking and shouting for anyone to come for the woman.

            Soon their Father arrived.

            “Dad?” Marmora tugged on his cape.

            “Yes son?”

            “Who’s that lady?” Marmora wanted to help her, but he didn’t want to get in trouble for talking to a stranger. Lotor picked his son up as the druids carried the woman away.

            “She’s your mother.” Marmora stared at the woman a bit longer.

            Her hair was slowly, but surely fading to white. She was shorter than any adult he had ever seen outside the arena. Her ears were round, and she lacked any markings.

            Still he felt the urge to be close to her. Lotor set the boy on a chair outside the clinic, KitKat sat beside him.

            “What’s Mama like?” KitKat blinked.

            “… She…” KitKat tried to think of an answer. “She’s very loving. She’s super duper smart and she tells the best stories. She loves us and Papa with every part of her heart.”

            Marmora stared at the door. He wanted to be with his Mama. He wanted to be able to talk to the woman who gave him life.

            KitKat held his hand.

            She knew their Daddy wouldn’t let Mama leave. He barley let people see her. Mama was stuck in that room.

            Who knew if she was ever going to be let out.

            “Should we go inside?” Marmora asked.

            “No… We’d just end up like her.” KitKat warned.  Marmora nodded. “Just stay right here with me, and I’ll protect you.”

            “Protect me?”

            “From Papa. I won’t let him lock you up like he did Mama.” KitKat promised. “Promise you won’t ever be like Daddy.”

            “I promise.” Marmora stared at the door worried.

 

            Lotor stood by his wife. He held her hand. She wasn’t responding. He placed a hand on her stomach.

            “Check on the child. She’s going to want to save them.” A druid started preforming tests. One ran out, only to return with Haggar and medical supplies. “Witch, what’s going on?”

            “If we want to save the children we have to act now, give them a synthetic womb, a synthetic birth. They will develop as if they were inside your wife.” Haggar explained. Lotor nodded.

            “Children?”

            “By the looks of it you will be having identical twins, congratulations.” Lotor was silent for a moment before choosing his next question.

            “What happened to her?”

            “Lack of exercise, and lack of proper nutrition.” Haggar stared at her. “Pregnancy and quintessence don’t mix well.”  The Altean brushed the hair from the human’s face. “Take it from someone who almost lost her child from it. She may wake up without memories. If she does… I suggest using the chance to rekindle your romance instead of attempting to force her to care for a child she doesn’t remember.”

            For the first time Lotor felt like she was actually his mother.

            “Once you find a way to make her fall for you again, reintroduce her to your children.” Haggar suggested. “I hope your relationship with Mrs. Kathrine is better than your fathers and my own.”

            “Thank you. That means a lot… Honerva.” Lotor awkwardly patted Haggar’s shoulder. She worked on operating on Pidge.

            “I just want your children’s childhood to be better than yours… But by the looks of their father, they are already doing better.”

            “Thank you.”

            “Go comfort your children, they need you.”

            “This would be much more comforting if you weren’t elbow deep in my wife’s insides.” That earned him a laugh.

            He wanted to stay with Pidge, but he knew he should get the kids to sleep. He’d make sure to be there when she started to wake.

           

            KitKat perked up seeing her father leave the room.

            “Bed time.”

            “Is Mama ok?” Marmora asked.

            “She’s fine.” Lotor smiled. “Bed time. I’ll tell you a story.”

            “I wanna hear about Mama.” Marmora smiled as KitKat grabbed his hand.

            “Of course, I love your Mother.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank everyone for your support, I just wanted to let you know the story is going to split into different 'plots' one with an amnesiac Pidge, and the other with a focus on the children and their development. Let me know what you think of the story so far, and what you think I could improve of.


	21. Know that I’m with you The only way that I can be Until you’re in my arms again Remember me

Lotor smiled as he held Pidge’s hand. According to Haggar she was due to wake soon.

            Soon, so very soon, he’d be graced with the presence of his wife. Who had been sleeping for two months.

            Her honey eye’s flickered open. He watched her attempt to sit up.

            “Katie stop, you just woke up. Don’t push yourself.” Her eyes on him.

            Everything that was in her eyes these eyes was gone, all the pain, the hidden hatred, the tears. Instead, they were placed with curiosity.

            “Um… Are you talking to me?” She asked confused.

            “Of course, whom else would I be addressing other than my lovely wife?” Lotor helped her change out of the healing suit into a simple lavender dress.

            “Wife?”

            “Of course. You are Kathrine Holt… But you like to go by Katie or Pidge. We married some years ago.” Lotor offered his arm to her. Pidge cautiously took his arm.

            Lotor smile down at her.

            “Um… I know we’re supposed to be married, but I don’t recall your name.” He squeezed her hand and kissed her head.

            “Of course, the medical officers said that the accident could have an effect on your memory.” Lotor stopped in the middle of the hall to kneel before her. Taking her hands in his, bringing them to his lips. “I am Emperor Lotor Daibazaal, of the Galran Empire, and your husband.”

            Pidge started down at him. She seemed to trust his words.

            “I love you, Katie, more than anything in the world. I understand if you need time to remember your feelings.”

            “Alright, thank you, Lotor.” She watched him stand with curiosity.

            He led her back to their room, Which he had once again renovated in her absence.

            Now it was built like a small apartment. It had everything Pidge could every want or need in his absence.

            And so Lotor watched his wife fall into a rhythm. She’d wake up and cook breakfast for them, it usually burnt. After they ate he’d head to work but keep a camera on her to watch her movements.

            He’d watch her work on projects he left in the lab. She usually either worked on tech or experimented on plants. Pidge would take a break for lunch, to eat it in the synthetic Green House. After she’d water the plants.

            Her plants started yielding produce after awhile, and she started using them in her cooking.

            After working in the Green House she’d use the books he left for her to study. Then relax and watch the Limited channels, movies, and shows he allowed her.

            He’d ‘come home’ after a long day of ruling and she’d be making dinner happily.

            “Evening, Dearest.” Lotor smiled seeing her at the stove humming. He smiled as he placed a gift on the table.

            “What’s this? Did I miss a birthday or anniversary?”

            “It’s alright, you have no recollection of it, so I don’t blame you.”  Lotor smiled.

            “What is it?”

            “Our marriage anniversary.” Pidge blinked and gasped.

 

            “I knew today was something special, stay here and watch the food.” He nodded watching her run off to her hobby rooms to grab something. While she was gone he slipped some quintessence into the food before stirring it in.

            She returned with a box full of something.

            “What do you have there?”

            “Well, when I was working I had this feeling today was something special…” She took a Robot cat out of the box. It looked like a miniature version of the Voltron Lions with all the colors of the lions on it. “I feel bad that my health is so bad I can’t leave this room. You must be lonely, so I made Ron Volt here to keep you company.” Lotor tried not to break the robotic cat, his loving wife had built just for him.

            “I love it.” He smiled and moved the food off the heat. He lifted Pidge onto the counter and kissed her lovingly. “Almost as much as I love you.”

            “I love you too.” Pidge wrapped her arms around him. Lotor smirked picked her up bridal style and setting her on her chair at the dinner table. He served what he assumed to be stew to him and his wife.

            “Now its your turn to open your gift.” Lotor pushed the box towards her.

            “Dinner first. I really want you to try this new recipe! I worked really hard on it for you…”

            “Alright, alright.” Lotor sat down across from his wife. She smiled as he took a spoonful of stew. Her cooking had been getting slowly better. “It tastes delicious Pidge.”

            Ron started circling Lotor’s feet and sat beside him. Lotor ignored the cat and continued eating the food.

            Pidge smiled and ate her own bowl.

            “Seconds, love?” Lotor asked.

            “I’m full.”

            “You need to be healthy, what if we decide to have children?” Pidge choked on her water. Lotor jumped up and began rubbing her back. “Are you alright?”

            “Sorry I just wasn’t expecting… that… I mean…” Pidge blushed at Lotor’s stare. “Not that I don’t want children, it’s just I want more of my memory back before we do have kids, or at least of having a memory of being married to you for a year or two before we discuss children.” Lotor nodded.

            “I understand.” He kissed her cheek and grabbed her empty dish. “But be better about your health.”

            “Alright, I will.” Pidge let him place the wrapped box into her lap.

            “Present time.” He sang. “Happy Anniversary Katie.”

            “Happy Anniversary Lotor.” She let him wrap his arms around her shoulders. She gently ripped the paper and broke the box.

            She blinked as she pulled out a dark green dress, with glittering star like sparkles. However, the dress was only the first thing in that box. Next was a set of black sandal heels, then an expensive looking necklace with a matching tiara with purple and green jewels. She blushed at the last items in the box.

            A lacy panty and bra set, it was a dark purple.

            “I’ll admit those are a gift for both of us.” Lotor mumbled into her ear.

            “Ah… I see…” Pidge tried not to blush. “I don’t know if it will look good on me.”

            “Darling, I know for sure you’ll look enchanting.” Pidge nervously tried not to shrink away from her husband. Who had been nothing but understanding and loving in the past few months. Who had worked to try and help her.

            But she had this nagging feeling something was wrong. And she didn’t know why.

 

            In the nursery, KitKat played house with Marmora.

            “Mama and Papa’s anniversary’s Today,” KitKat said from their tiny table. Marmora fake cooked eats.

            “Oh, how are they celebrating? I know Daddy had a party today to celebrate his rule.” Marmora asked.

            “Probably by doing mushy gushy adult stuff.”

            Neither child had seen their mother since she recovered. They did get to see the tube their younger brothers were developing in.

            “I can’t wait till we meet Damon and Adlai,” Marmora mumbled trying to cheer KitKat up.

            “Yeah me neither…” Suddenly their game seemed less happy.

            KitKat wondered if she’d turn into a monster like their dad.

            Locking those she cares about up. Never letting her children see their family.

            She tried protecting Marmora from it. From their father.

            But it was only a matter of time before their father tried to separate them from each other. The governesses were already distancing them and trying to get them to work on their own, stating they might have to fight each other someday.

            KitKat worried for Damon and Adlai, her two baby twin brothers who had yet to truly enter the world.

            What could she do to protect her family? She was powerless against her father. And Marmora was just like their mother.

            He was a sweet boy, but he was weak, submissive.

            He needed to be protected, he wouldn’t do it himself.

            KitKat sighed shaking her head on what to do about their life.

            She promised not to be her father.

            With the exception, that it would protect her siblings and whoever they choose to love.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just sat there for five minutes figuring out what to call Ron Volt, Originally, or unoriginally it was gonna be Volt Ron, but I thought that'd be weird, not the Ron Volt isn't.


	22. I Love You Too Much

Pidge glanced at the door. Lotor was running late that evening. She continued watching the show that was one.

              She grew more weary the longer she watched.

              Character A and B were in a seemingly loving relationship. They followed a strict routine. But Character A couldn’t have children. Something B wanted more than anything in the world. Soon A started following B around as they became more and more distant only to realize B was having an affair with C their assistant.

              Pidge ate her dinner robotically watching the plot play out.

              C had become pregnant, and B was forced to choose between the two. Ultimately choosing C because of the baby.

              Pidge placed a hand on her stomach. She couldn’t help but worry the same thing was happening in her life.

              What if Lotor had gotten bored of her? What if he no longer loved her because she wanted to wait to have children? Pidge suddenly lost her apatite.

              She stared at the door once more.

              Lotor warned her not to leave the room, claiming she had health issues she doesn’t recall having. He said everything in this room was a controlled environment meant to keep her safe and healthy.

              He also spent long hours away from her and didn’t like to talk about life outside of their apartment.

              What if he was cheating on her? Only to not come home one day in favor of his new wife?

              Pidge quickly looking for ideas to keep her husband with her. She thought back to their anniversary and some of the more raunchy books she read the other day.

              She quick ran into the room in search for the gift. She blushed as she grabbed the clothing items she was searching for. She bit her lip as she ran around the apartment looking for ways to make her little idea come to life.

 

              Lotor sighed as his work finished up. Not only was the empire demanding more of his time, but KitKat had been acting out more lately too. And it was taking up the free time he set aside for his darling wife.

              He had one last stop to make. Damon and Adlai were scheduled for their synthetic ‘birth’ soon. Lotor could see their appearance through the glass of the tube. Two identical boys, tanned skin like their older sister, and white hair to match his own. They also seemed to share the pointed ears, which seemed to be a staple on the children. But these two noticeably lacked Altean marks. He smiled and left the room.

              He was excited to see his lovely wife. Lotor felt bad for missing dinner. He wondered if she had gone to bed. He quietly opened the door.

              He was surprised at what he saw. Fairy lights and electric tea candles lit the way to the bedroom, and there were flower petals scattered about. He followed the path to the bedroom after giving Ron a pet to head back to his charge station.

              He chuckled when he saw Pidge on their bed. She obviously had something planned. She was lying on the bed wearing the cute lingerie he got her on their anniversary. Her hair was pulled out of her face.

              Lotor kissed her neck and grabbed her Pj’s. He switched her out of the lingerie to one of her favorite shirts of his to wear to bed. He smiled as she rolled into his chest. He removed her from him, so he could remove his armor. He turned all the lights off and tucked Pidge back into bed.

              He paused when he saw tears slide down her cheeks. He kissed the tears away and rubbed her arm to comfort her.

              “No…” She whimpered in her sleep. “Don’t leave…” Lotor gentley shook her.

              “Pidge, darling wake up! Katie! Kathrine!” Pidge bolted up at the call of her name.

              She threw her arms around Lotor.

              “Don’t leave me!” Pidge sobbed into his shoulder.

              “Pidge, Pidge, love, calm down.” Lotor held her close in his lap. “I’m not going anywhere.” He rubbed her back. “What would give you that idea?”

              Pidge sobbed what had happened earlier. Lotor laughed and kissed her head gently.

              “Pidge, dearest, I’d never cheat on you. And I’d never leave you for any reason.” Lotor kissed her deeply. “You’re my whole universe. I won’t let anything separate us.”

              “But you want kids, and its going to be a while before I’m ready to-” He stopped her sentence with a kiss.

              “I don’t need anything else. I don’t need children or my empire.” He kissed along her neck. “I only need you.” He cupped her face and made her look at him. “You believe me, don’t you?” Pidge stared up at him happily.

              “Of course, you’re my husband. Just… try to make it home sooner.”

              “I’ll do what I can.” Lotor dragged Pidge down into a laying position on the bed. “I love you so much, Pidge.”

              “I love you too.”

              “Katie? Would you leave me if you had the chance?”

              “Never, sure I get lonely sometimes, but I love you too much to leave you.”

              It hurt.

              Her smile and unconditional love hurt.

              Why did it hurt him?

              He should be happy.

              Pidge, his beautiful wife, the mother of his children, and the former Green Paladin, had just announced her love for him. Promising she wouldn’t leave his side.

              Why isn’t he happy?

              He looked deep into her eyes and realized the reason.

              It was the reason his father never told Haggar she was Honerva.

              She wasn’t the same person anymore.

              He had killed the Green Paladin.

              His Paladin. Young, beautiful, and full of fire. She used to be full of so much life. She never backed down.

              This girl, who he was holding in his arms was so much different.

              This Pidge was submissive. She was molded to be the ideal wife. She was basically a toy. He had to make her remember.

              If she remembered his heart would stop hurting. It wouldn’t feel like he lost the only thing that mattered.

              The only question was how.


	23. You Are My Sunshine

Lotor listened to Pidge hum as she did the dishes. Ron, her little robotic creation, weaved between her feet as she scrubbed.

            The little robotic cat was proof that she remembered her past somewhere deep inside. She had the fire he fell in love with deep down inside her.

            But how to reawaken it…

            “You are my Sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are grey.” She sang, seemingly unaware of what she was doing. “You’ll never know dear how much I love you…”

            Lotor knew this song. He remembered it well.

_“…Please don’t take my Sunshine away.” Pidge silently sang. Lotor glanced at her curiously as she continued. “The other night dear, while I was sleeping, I dreamt I held you in my arms. When I awoke, dear, I was mistaken, so I hung my head an cried.”_

_“That’s a rather somber song.”_

_“It’s a song about lost love, people usually only sing the chorus.”_

_“I see, so why do you sing it?”_

_“I miss Earth.” Pidge stared at the sunset, she started the chorus back up. “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey.” Lotor smiled as he placed a hand on hers, listening to the intimate words. “You’ll never know dear, how much I love you, please don’t take my sunshine away.”_

_“Are any of these verses happy?” Pidge giggled and intertwined their fingers._

_“I'll always love you and make you happy, If you will only say the same.” She held his hand to her chest, well aware of the blush dusting his cheeks. “But if you leave me and love another, You'll regret it all someday.”_

_“As if I would leave you, after all…You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray.” He started singing the chorus for her. “You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.”_

“You told me once, dear, you really loved me, And no one else could come between. But now you've left me and love another; You have shattered all of my dreams.” Lotor sang allowed sadley reminiscing. He wasn’t sure if Pidge could hear him.

“You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, You make me happy when skies are gray. You'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away.” She kept signing all the same.

“In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me. When I awake my poor heart pains, So when you come back and make me happy, I'll forgive you dear, I'll take all the blame.” Pidge stared back at him with a shocked expression. He felt tears wetting his cheeks. Despite neither of them singing at the moment he could still hear the ending ringing loud in his ears.

_“You are my sunshine.” Pidge stared into his eyes._

_“My only sunshine.” Lotor pulled her closer to him. “You make me happy when skies are gray.”_

_“You'll never know dear, how much I love you, please don't take my sunshine away.” The leaned together as they finished in unison to kiss._

            A dish crashed onto the floor.

            “Katie!” Lotor ran over to her. She looked at the floor shocked.

            “Oh, sorry, I thought I remembered something and I got distracted.”  Lotor cupped her face. “We were sitting together, watching the sunset, singing…” Pidge smiled shyly at him.  She placed a hand over her chest.

            “Darling?”

            “Nothing… Just... feeling a little home sick. Guess deep down I miss my home planet…”

            “There’s nothing wrong with missing places you consider home.”

            “Where do you considered home?” Pidge asked.

            “You.” She stared at him for a second before blushing and continuing nervously with the dishes. Lotor tilted his head.

            Not the reaction he was expecting.

 

            Pidge pretended her husband’s eyes weren’t on her. AS if he was searching for something she couldn’t deliver.

            “Lotor? Are you happy in our relationship?”

            “Why wouldn’t I be?”

            “I don’t know.”

            Lotor sighed and wrapped his arms around his wife, as she continued the dishes.

           

            He analyzed her. It seemed he could trigger her memories, but it would be small things. She would remember him. She’d remember how much she truly loved him, and she’d never leave him. She’d have that fire back in her eyes and her heart.

            “Something on your mind?” Lotor hadn’t realized how tightly he was holding her.

            “I’m just concerned you’ll never recall you past.”

            “… I am too, but…” She placed the last dish on the dish rack. “I have you.” Lotor bumped their foreheads gently.

            “I don’t deserve you, Katie.” She giggled and turned to wrap her arms around his neck.

            Lotor held her as close as he could.

           

            Then the doorbell rang.

            Pidge stared at the door curiously, while Lotor tried to ignore it in favor of holding his wife.

            It rang again. He sighed and let his arms fall. Pidge smiled at him and went to grab laundry while he talked with whomever was at the door.

            Lotor had no idea who could have been there.

            He warned his underlings never to disturb him unless it was urgent. And the Kids didn’t know this room existed. They barely had more freedom than their mother.

            So, who could be at his door? He chuckled as Pidge brought the laundry bucket out and started folding the laundry.

            “Darling, be careful, you don’t want strangers to see your intimate do you?”

            “That’s why I’m folding yours first.”

            Lotor was about to rebuttal when the bell started ringing again.

            “We will talk about this later.” He joked.

            The ringing hadn’t stopped this time, continuously going off.

           

            Pidge watched as she folded. They didn’t get people at their door often. Lotor claimed he ordered it for her safety. She didn’t have any reason not to believe him.

            Lotor started by imputing the code to the door. It was a series of numbers she learned was their anniversary. Then he unbolted the locks and opened the door.

            Then all hell broke loose.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who could be at the door? Why are they at the door? Make you guesses now!


	24. It's Not Easy Being Green

 

              Lotor was quick to dodge the Paladins attacks, grabbing his sword from the ‘umbrella’ bin. Pidge was frozen in place. She was confused and worried.

              Lotor was heavily outnumbered, and his sword was the only weapon he kept in the house. He kept glancing at Pidge to make sure she was safe.

              Suddenly one of the Paladins forced their way past Lotor.

              Hunk grabbed Pidge’s arm.

              “Pidge lets go.”

              “How do you know my name?” She wasn’t shaking. She didn’t know why, but she wasn’t scared, in fact, part of her wanted to leave with this stranger.

              “We’re best friends.” She heard the blue stranger shout in fake disbelief. “Sorry Lance, but she is my platonic Soulmate.” She ripped her hand from the strangers. Lotor had beaten Allura and Keith to a standstill.

              They wouldn’t leave without his wife, and he couldn’t live without her. She ran over to his side commenting horrified at a wound Keith managed to land on him. Pidge rambled on about a first aid kit as she ran into the bathroom. Everyone was too shocked to move.

              Lotor smirked, Pidge was loyal as ever.

              “Paladins, can’t you see she’s happy?” He asked as the woman in question returned and began to patch his wound up. “My dear Kitten could leave any time, but she chooses to stay with me.”

              “She doesn’t remember us.” Hunk’s voice was empty.

              “What did you do to her!?” Lance screamed readying his Bayard. Pidge blinked, Lotor would never do anything to harm her right. There was no way he could be the source of her amnesia, he always claimed he wanted her to get better.

              “Lotor?” She stared at him expecting him to say something.

              “Don’t mind them, my love, they are fools who want to rip us apart.” Lotor kissed her forehead.

              “The kids aren’t here,” Allura claimed after scanning the room. “There’s no evidence of any children having a presence here. What did you do with them?”  
              “Children? Lotor what are they talking about? Who are they?” Pidge looked confused more than frightened.

              “I told you not to mind them.” He grabbed her hand and brought it to his lips. “Look at me, you know me, I’d never do anything to hurt you.” Allura squinted before gasping.

              “You wouldn’t! You didn’t!” Allura marched over and took a closer look. Pidge clung to Lotor as the former Princess grabbed a strand of Pale brown, almost white hair. “You did!”

              “Did? Did what? What’s going on?”

              “You poisoned her with quintessence!”

              “I’d never poison her!” Lotor shouted. Pidge’s head was swimming.

              “More like you’d never let her leave you! You’re an obsessed monster who raped your wife then forced her to forget by messing with her mind!”

              “I never raped her!” Their shouting became to much, Pidge ripped her hand from Lotor and ran. She didn’t know where she was going but she ran.

              Words and Pictures swirled around her mind. Her head hurt. Ron wasn’t far behind her. Pidge was finally at what she guessed to be a ship hanger. No one made an effort to stop her.

              She finally rested by the foot of a Giant Green ship in the shape of a lion. It was oddly comforting to be around.

              The Beast Lowered its head for Pidge to lean against. Pidge stared at the giant creature in awe.

              But she wasn’t afraid, in fact, the Giant Green Lion had been the least confusing most comforting thing she had run into all day.

              Green began to purr and sooth Pidge, putting a particle barrier around them both. Pidge relaxed against the metal, sighing as energy flowed through her, banishing all the thoughts she had before.

 

              _Pidge opened her eyes. She was in a grassy field within a forest, the only other resident was a green Lioness. The lioness beckoned Pidge over with a nod of her head. Pidge felt the sun on her face, the wind in her hair. She followed the lioness without question. Finally, they came upon a large tree surrounded by a pond. The Lioness leaned down to drink, signaling Pidge to do the same._

_She leaned down and saw her own reflection. It was nothing like the one she saw earlier in the day._

_Her eyes a brighter gold, not dull, but alive with fire. Her hair was an exciting Auburn, nothing like the pale color it no held. Her entire face looked more alive._

_Compared to how she knew she looked…. Something in her must’ve died during the accident._

_“No child, he lied.” The voice was motherly, caring. Pidge stared at the Lioness, who was intently staring at her. “He killed who you used to be, because you constantly tried to run, to be happy. He cannot live without you. But, my dear, it's not his choice, it's yours. If you want me to I will return your memories.”_

_Pidge looked down at the girl in her reflection. God did she want to be like that again._

_“You can?”_

_“But you may not be happy…”_

_“But I’ll be myself again, won’t I?”_

_“Yes, my Paladin you will be. The little Spitfire I remember.” The lion touched her forehead to Pidge’s._

_She felt energy flow through her, invigorate her. Pidge could tell that there was a connection closer than anything in the universe, on par with a mother and child._

Pidge’s eyes shot open, filled once again with light as memories played like a movie.

              “Come on Green, let’s do what we do best.” Pidge smiled as the Lion roared.


	25. Eye of the Tiger

“Hey Girl, long time no see, huh?” Pidge asked entering the cockpit. Her hands grazed the familiar metal. This was the most at home Pidge had felt in years. Green’s purrs proved the Lions happiness to have their Paladin back.

              She plopped down into the chair taking a deep breath as she clasped the controls.

              “Let’s give this all we got.” She flew Green out of the hanger, screaming and shouting, this was the most fun she’d had in years. She started with the guard ships. Taking their guns out one by one. Laughing as she shot the canon. She could hear the other Paladins cheering on the coms. She felt alive.

              Meanwhile Lotor was elated and distraught. He got his wife back, but she was wild and rebelling. Were they not allowed to be a happy family?

              “Seal the children in cryopods!” Lotor ordered. “Aim all guns at the Green Lion! We want to stun the lion! I want the Green Paladin back her with minimal injury!” A few guards ran off to follow the first set of orders while everyone else began to run to their stations.

              The Paladins ran to their Lions, hooping and hollering the entire way. They flew out to meet the Green Lion.

              “Been so long since we’ve had a Pilot for Green.” Allura wiped tears from her eyes.

              “She has always been very, very, picky.” Pidge joked.

              “Wouldn’t have been the same without you.” Lance gave a thumbs up.

              “I hope to fuck it wouldn’t be!”

              “Pidge would you do the honors?” Shiro asked.

              “Of course, I’d love to! FORM VOLTRON!”

              The Lions roared one after another. All the Paladins laughing as loud and happily as they could, tears falling from all their eyes.

              Pidge felt alive. She felt ready. She felt so surrounded by love and support. Like for the first time in forever she was free and she was happy.

              Not even the hits from the ship’s guns phased their happiness.

             

              Lotor ordered Haggar to the command room.

              “Get that Komar operational! I’m going to destroy those lions and kill the Paladins! They’ve tried to take my wife for the last time!” He sounded livid, but Haggar nodded with understanding.

              There was no turning back now. The Lotor of the past was gone, once and for all. It gave Haggar a sense of Dejavu.

              An emperor who lived his wife so much he was willing to risk everything, even the close bonds he shared with Paladins.

              Lotor had become what he hated most, his father. But it wasn’t her place to lecture him. She could only pity the object of his obsessions.

              Meanwhile the Madman watched Voltron soar through the sky, waiting for the moment Komar would activate and he’d be able to get his wife back once and for all.

              He paced as he waited for the signal. 

              He got annoyed and walked over to the speaker coms.

              “WHAT IS TAKING SO LONG?” Lotor asked.

              “It is taking a moment to warm up. It hasn’t been used since your father battled Voltron.” Haggar tried reasoning.

              “Well warm it up FASTER!” He paced more until he was given notice the Komar was ready. It took only minutes, but it felt like hours. The longer Lotor had to wait to be with his wife the more irritable he became.

              He needed her more than he needed air. He loved her. She was his wife, he sweet Pidge. Katie, the mother of his children and the love of his wife.

              Pidge’s punishment would be the death of her friends. But he wouldn’t be the one to deal the blow. Then he came up with a great idea.

              He ordered someone special on the ship to be summoned.

 

              The Paladin’s laughed and smiled. Lance and Hunk kept joking on the monitors as they took down parts of the Galra ship.

              “We have to be careful.” Pidge warned. “I don’t know where Lotor’s keeping the kids.”

              Next to her Ron purred and batted at her display. As if pointing. Pidge glanced down.

              “Wait! I think I know how to find them! We need scync Ron up to the Lions.”

              “Ron?” Shiro asked.

              “Yeah Ron Volt, he’s a robot cat I made! He follows Lotor around the ship he should know where the kids are!”

              “Ron Volt… Volt Ron… Voltron… HOW DID YOU NOT REMEMBER BEFORE?” Hunk shouted.

              “Because I was poisoned with quintessence? It’s a hell of a drug!” Pidge defended. Allura sighed.

              “Alright, hook him… Them…? It up to the best of your ability.” Allura ordered. Pidge hopped off her chair and grabbed some of the random cords she had left in Green when she originally left with Lotor.

              “Try not to freak out girl.” Pidge earned herself a reassuring purr from the lion. It took a few minutes, and Green shaking from hits didn’t help but eventually she got the two hooked up and began going through Ron’s video feed. Unfortunately, he didn’t have a map, so Pidge had to rely on her memory and hope the interior of the ship hadn’t changes

              “Find them yet?”

              “No, Lotor seems to always shake Ron before the most Eastern hall, so we can safely assume that’s where their located. But that’s still a big area. Attacking any area around there could risk Kitora, Marmora, or even.” Pidge placed a hand on her stomach. It felt weird with the knowledge she had only been a few months pregnant when she was sick. She prayed Lotor saved the baby at that time. She didn’t even know her third child’s name.

              “We’ll save them, Pidge, we promise.” Hunk’s voice rang out.

              “Yeah I know.” She smiled and hoped they could sense it. “You came back for me after all.”


	26. It End's Tonight

              “Sire the Komar is operational.” Haggar’s voice was the first bit of good news Lotor heard.

              “Good, fi-“

              “I must warn you, with your wife’s current physical state, she may not survive the attack.”

              “She’s in a Voltron Lion. It will only wind her. Then she’ll know who she belongs to!” Haggar nodded. She was somewhat shocked. While Lotor was possessive of Pidge, he always claimed he just wanted Pidge by his side, to be _with_ him. He never claimed ownership of her.

              It was at times like that she was glad that her and Zarkon’s relationship was distant after the accident. She didn’t have to suffer like Pidge did.

              Though she did occasionally envy the woman, getting to remember and raise her own children. Getting to be happy with the being she loved, even if for a short time. Getting to have a family.

              But all of that was useless without freedom. Zarkon seemed to have similar thoughts, his hand landing on her shoulder.

              “Even if she survives this… She’ll be dead on the inside won’t she.” Haggar stated.

              “Not that it matters.” Zarkon shrugged.

              “I guess I feel sorry for the girl because had things gone differently… I would be her.”

              _She felt nothing but exhaustion. The only sound in her ears were the sounds of medical equipment and the cry of a baby. She could barley remember who she was. Her eyes kept flickering to the lonely infant screaming for attention in his crib. A large male creature, her husband, kept trying to get her attention._

_“Honerva, look, we did it Honerva… We finally had a baby… It’s a boy…” His sobs joined the few sounds she could hear._

_“Boy… I’m happy.” She mumbled._

_“He still needs a name…” Zarkon tried keeping her awake. He placed the crying baby in her arms. He was so tiny. A small white tuft of hair, and smooth purple skin._

_“… Lotor…”_

_“What was that?”_

_“Lotor…”_

_“What does the name mean?”_

_“True love… Or obsession. It doesn’t translate well into Galran… Basically it means a love that encompasses everything.” Honerva’s eyes felt heavy. “My Little prince Lotor.”_

_The Next day she awoke, no memory of where she was or who she was. All the was in the room with her was a sleeping boy.  She swaddled the baby safely in his blankets before following her instincts to a lab._

              Haggar aimed the device at Voltron.

              “Sire I urge you once more to reconsider. Not as your father’s adviser, but as your mother.” Haggar tried once more to reason with Lotor.

              “SHUT UP AND SHOOT THAT QUIZNAKING ROBOT!” Lotor ordered.

              “Locking onto target.” Haggar went about business as usual. “Launching the Komar in 5.”

              Finally, there was a knock at the door.

              “4.”

              Lotor signaled them to be let in.

              “3.”

              There stood KitKat, recently awoken from her nap.

              “2.”

              “Daddy what’s going on?” KitKat asked.

              “1.”

              A beam shot at Voltron, causing all the lights on the mech to go dark.

              “Send a search party in there for the Paladins.” Lotor ordered. KitKat was quickly rushed to her fathers’ side. “Sweet heart, you remember your Mama’s friends?” KitKat nodded. “Well it turns out they were very bad people, and they put a spell on Mama.”

              “A spell?”

              “Yeah, like a princess. They want your mama to do bad things and turn her against our family.” KitKat nodded in understanding.

              “How do we free mama?”

              “A Princess pure of heart has to slay them.” Lotor took his sword out. “Can you do that for Daddy? To save Mommy?” KitKat stared at the sword.

              “So, their like dragons.”

              “The worst kind, they’d have your mother hurt your brothers.” Those words shook KitKat to her core and Lotor could tell.

              “Mama would never hurt them.”

              “Unless she was under a spell. But Daddy can’t…” Lotor placed the sword in her tiny hands. “Daddy isn’t a princess.”

              “Ok… I’m gonna slay Allura… And Mama’s other friends… To save Mama, and protect my family. Like a good princess.”

              “Good girl. Daddy is going to try and keep Mama safe while You slay the monsters. Can you wait for Daddy’s cue to come in?”

              “Cue?”

              “Daddy will say something about family, and a guard will let you in. When you come in, if I nod, then you know Mama’s old friends are evil, okay?” KitKat nodded holding the sheathed sword as if it was a stuffed animal.

              “Ok! I can protect Mama!” KitKat’s eyes burned with passion. Lotor smirked and kissed his daughter forehead. “Alright, dearest, go and finished your nap, you’ll need all your strength.” KitKat nodded and began her lonely journey back to her room.

 

              Pidge groaned in pain. It felt like she had been hit with lightening. She glanced at Ron, only to see his entire system had been fried.      

              “Roll call, everyone check in. Whose alive?” Pidge mumbled.

              “Black Paladin Shiro reporting in.”

              “Keith, I feel like I’ve been through a toaster.” Keith mumbled.

              “Lance, the handsome one.”

              “Princess Allura, alive and… not dead at least.”

              “Hunk’s hiding.”

              “Pidge, ok, but it feels like I have a hangover.” Pidge moaned.

              “Guys wait there someone in-“ Lance’s voice cut off there.

              Pidge’s blood ran cold.

              She had to get to another Lion. If only to protect whose ever Lion she could get to. Taking a few deep breathes, Pidge stood on wobbly legs.

              “Come on Pidge, you’ve been through worse.” Thankfully when Voltron is formed there are airtight pathways between the Lions. Yellow or Black were her safest bets. If Blue had gotten attacked that meant they were picking the largest populated Lion first. The Red, because of how dangerous Keith was.

              Yellow was probably the last on their list to pillage. Pidge made her way down to Hunk’s lion. He was huddled in the corner with his bayard, only lowering it after confirming the person he was seeing was Pidge. She crawled beside him, silently thank him for his protection.

              “We’re gonna be fine.” Hunk assured. “There’s nothing Lotor can do to hurt us, especially not without isolating you.” Pidge weakly smiled.

              Though the smile soon fell as the duo heard footsteps finally reach Hunk’s Lion. Pidge recognized their uniforms. Galran soldiers, working directly under her husband.

              “Your Royal Mistress, it is time to go home and face the consequences of your actions.”


	27. You Would Fall, and Turn the White Snow Red as Strawberries in the Summer Time

          There Pidge kneeled among her fellow Paladins, awaiting whatever punishment Lotor had cooked up for her. She locked eyes with her fellow paladins. Each showed worry, not for themselves but for her. For what they saw when they first arrived. They couldn’t bear to see their friend turn back into that.

          “Look at me Katie!” Lotor’s voice was loud and broke passed all her thoughts. Lotor was sitting upon his thrown, alone. An empty chair beside him. He looked as if he wanted to cry. “Have you come to hate me this much?”

          “You’ve done nothing but manipulate me Lotor, and you expect me to love you?” Pidge spat. “I was a fool, a fool to fall in love. At least now I can die knowing I’m surrounded by those who actually love me.”

          “I do love you, more than anything in the universe. More than the universe itself or my empire.” Lotor’s words were crazed and filled with sadness and madness. “YOU are my universe. Why can’t you just love me? We can be a family again. You, me, Marmora, Damen and Adlai. All of us can be a family.”

          “I’d rather die.” Pidge leaned into Allura next to her. Lotor’s eyes hardened.

          “So be it, but remember we could have been a happy family.” On cue KitKat entered.

          The paladins were shocked to see the young princess, sleepy in her purple night gown, holding a sword.

          The girl glanced to her father who gave her a nod. KitKat slowly drew the blade, trying to decide in what order to save her mom.

          “I’m sorry.” KitKat approached Allura. “I remember when I was little and you’d take care of me when mama couldn’t… You were probably putting a spell on me, like you did mama.” KitKat raised the sword. “Still I’ll miss you. So I’ll make this as painless as possible. Bye Auntie Allura.”

          It dawned on Pidge what was happening. Her eyes went wide.

          “KitKat! Listen! Don’t do it!”

          “It’s to save you Mama. Or else Marmora and Adlai and Damon will get hurt… and I promised to protect them.”

          Allura’s scream filled the room. KitKat had missed her neck and hit her shoulder instead. The child in question tried not to look at the blood and drew her blade for another blow.

          It took at least 10 blows for it to finally kill Allura. Pidge had thrown up at the sight of her baby girl covered in Allura’s blood, standing over the former princess’s dead lifeless body.

          KitKat moved onto Hunk a few spots away from Allura.

          “I’m sorry, you always cheered me up and made me yummy foods. But you understand why I have to do this. I love Mama, and I love my brothers. So, I have to. For them.”

          It took more hits to kill Hunk just do to his muscle and size. Hunk weakly smiled the whole time, as if to try and comfort the blood-soaked toddler. It wasn’t her fault she was doing this. She thought she was doing the right thing. Hunk could never blame a child.

          He did start sobbing by the seventh blow. He’d never be able to go home to Shay. She’d have to raise their daughter alone, now. All he could hope for was her happiness.

          And So KitKat continued. Saying a few words of kindness and then murdering Keith, Lance, and Shiro.

          Pidge was a sobbing mess on the floor. Praying for her turn.

          “Mama it’s ok.” KitKats voice broke through the dripping of blood. “You’re free now, the monsters are gone, and they’ll never put a spell on you again.”

          The girl dropped the sword at her mother feet smiling.

          “We can be a family again!” KitKat danced around, bloody footprints following her.

          Pidge was frozen in place. Lotor smirked.

          “Let’s get you wash up first, then we can have a family dinner.” The emperor patted his daughters’ blood splattered head. “Grandma and Grandpa can even join us.”

          As soon as KitKat left Pidge’s pained screams and wails left her body. Everything trapped in her at seeing the baby she birthed killing her closest friends finally broke free.

          Lotor let her be for a few minutes. Servants started cleaning up the mess around her as she cried in the puddle of blood.  He had a basin of warm water prepared to clean her off and fresh cloths brought in.

          Pidge’s sobs filled the room. She wouldn’t stop shaking. She slowly lost her voice as Lotor let her wallow in pain. Then it caught her eye.

          The sword KitKat left. Lotor’s sword. She took a few deep breathes to calm herself.

          Lotor watched her cautiously. He knew his wife’s mental state wasn’t the best at the moment. She picked the sword from the ground and held it to her wrist.

          Next think she knew, The sword had been blasted out of her hand, with a warning shot that only hit the hilt. Then a wet rag was pressed against her face.

          “We’ll have none of that.” Lotor mumbled into her ear, slowly starting to clean the blood off her.

          Pidge sat in silence as Lotor cleaned her, slowly. Stripping her of her bloodies clothes and replacing them with the fresh ones.        The entire time she just stared into space.

          Outside the ship you could hear the Lion’s of Voltron come back to life only to roar and anguish at the deaths of their paladins. Lotor was sure their cries could have been heard across the universe.

          Though they seemed to have been nothing to Pidge. Who just sat there staring, not blinking. He had to check to make sure she was breathing, and that’s when he saw it.

          Any fire that was left in her had died. Pidge’s once fire filled golden eyes were a dull honey, a caramel with no flavor.

          But he had to do it. She was trying to leave him, and he couldn’t live without her. And now he wouldn’t have to. He lifted her limp body of the ground and slowly walked to the medical bay.

          Pidge glanced blankly in the direction of the cryopods. Five in total. Four of which had been occupied. In one KitKat lay sleeping, clean of blood. Marmora in another. In the other two Pidge saw the sons she never got the chance to meet, beautiful twin boys. She shed a few tears for them and Lotor laid her in a pod.

          “Sleep for now, I’ll be back later for you.” He kissed her gently on the lips before sealing the pod, and Pidge’s future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We are nearing the End of if you ever come back, the last three chapters will probably be like a three-part epilogue showing the future's of Lotor, Pidge, and their children.   
> Thank you, everyone, for taking the time to read this story. It is one of the longest I've ever written and posted.  
> Once this story is finished I'll probably add more chapters to Storys people have requested more chapters of as well as write some stories with different pairings.


	28. I’m a twit, degenerate young rebel and I’m proud of it

          Lotor sat upon his throne for the thousandth time that thousandth year of his rule. He glanced at the clock, his anniversary with his wife was coming up. As well as the anniversary of him taking the throne. The invitations to his generals and children requesting their presence had already been sent.

          He glanced to his wife by his side, holding their youngest. The baby girl had the rest the siblings signature tan skin, but she had white hair and purple freckles dotting her body. She had Lotor’s blue eyes. Lotor smiled watching the pair.

          Their little Bex had been a surprise. Physically Pidge shouldn’t have been able to have anymore children. And yet, here Bex was, cooing at the world. Especially her mother.

          The doors opened. Lotor glared at whomever dared to ruin his moment with his Empress and princess. Only to soften it after seeing who entered.

          Guard’s, holding Marmora, who had rebelled and left for the Blade that shared his name, and assisted his mother so long ago. Only his armor was different.

          “I see the Lion’s have picked new Paladins.” Lotor said noting the yellow armor.

          “Father, I don’t want to fight you.”

          “Which is why you’ll go back into stasis.”

          “You can’t! The universe needs Voltron!” A warning shot was fired at the gentle teen’s feet. Marmora shut his mouth and glanced at his father with pleading eyes that were so reminiscent of his mothers. “Father, _please_ , the universe is dying trying to keep up with your demands for quintessence. It would be one thing if you were using it for fuel, but to keep an unwilling wife by your side, and children who want to be free-“

          “Shut up!” Lotor’s voice grew loud. Pidge quickly tried to calm the child in her arms, trying not to shake at the volume and tone of Lotor’s voice. “Kitten, tell your son that you can leave my side at any time, you just choose not to.”

          “I’d have no where to go.” Pidge confirmed.

          “I heard wise words that the second Black Paladin told the Green Paladin once… ‘If you worry about what might go wrong you might miss the chance to do something great.’ Do those words mean anything to you now? Because they did back then!” Marmora cried, trying to get through to his mother. KitKat had claimed their mother had been a fearless Paladin, that she was full of fire, thousands of years ago. All Marmora had to do was start that fire again and everything would be alright, right? “Please, the universe is dying mom and you’re the only one who can save it.”

          Pidge stood up and placed Bex into a nearby crib. She silent left her throne and joined her son who was being forced to kneel on the ground. She signaled the guards to let him go and pulled him into a tight hug.

          “Mom?”

          “It’s time to come home.” Pidge stated.

          “What?! I thought you’d be proud of me!” Marmora was shocked at his mother.

          “I can’t, Marmora, I _can’t_.” She started sobbing. All Marmora could do was returned the tight hug Pidge had him in. “Please, please, _please,_ come home. I don’t want you to end up like me, or my fellow paladins. You’re such a sweet boy, I don’t want to see you broken or killed by someone innocent who has no idea what’s going on. Just come home and be safe be with your siblings.”

          It was at that moment Marmora realized why KitKat gave up the throne. He had heard a story in the Blade that Lotor had a child kill the Paladins. The Balmeran’s would claim it was a little girl the Paladins trusted and loved. The Olkari always mentioned her likeness to the green paladin. But it just now dawned on the boy that the girl who had killed the Paladins was his loving older sister.

          “… I think I’ll go to my room now…” Marmora said blankly, with so many questions for his sister.

          “Why don’t you take Bex with you and put her down for a nap.” Lotor smiled. “Your mother and I have to discuss plans for some events coming up.”

          Marmora nodded. He carefully took his baby sister and swiftly made his way to the room he shared with his siblings.

          It was a rather large room with 50 assorted beds and cribs. All belonging to Marmora and his siblings. He found Bex’s crib and laid her down for a nap. He asked plenty of his younger siblings if they had seen all of their oldest sibling. Until he finally found her sitting on his old bed.

          “I thought you weren’t coming back.” KitKat mumbled.

          “I wasn’t going to… Hey sissy?”

          “You haven’t called me that in hundreds of years. Did something happen?”

          “I learned some things about who killed the last iteration of Paladins… And… I have to know… Were you the girl?”

          Silence fell over the two.

          “Father told me they were evil… That they had put a spell on Mama.” KitKat began. “That if a girl with a pure heart slayed the monsters Mama would be free and we could be a happy family again… He also inferred that if I didn’t they would trick Mama into hurting you, Damon, and Adlai.”

          “Only us three?”

          “The others hadn’t been born yet… I had promised to protect you no matter what… I always knew our family was messed up, but I didn’t think Father would manipulate me into hurting mama like that.”

          “… We have to do something.” Marmora said.

          “Like what? Mama couldn’t do anything!” KitKat shouted, causing silence to fall over the entire room. “You want to go on a death mission against our father?! He killed Mama’s friends! He didn’t care about her mental state as long as he could have her by his side! He doesn’t care about the universe!”

          Marmora took a deep breath.

          “If you worry about what could go wrong you might miss your chance to do something great.”

          “Don’t quote Shiro.”

          “That’s what he told _our_ mother when she had doubts about being the Green Paladin.” Slowly their siblings began to gather. Marmora looked around him. “You ever wonder why father keeps us under strict rules? Because he knows we have the same fire in us that mom had! Our mother broke into a government facility, got kicked out, snuck back in under a different name, went to space bonded with the green Lion and defeated our grand father to save her family! And when she did she kept going to save the Universe!”

          “Look what good that did her.” One of the younger siblings shouted.

          “Because there was only one of her! There are 50 of us. And at least 40 of us have the ability to fight and stand up!”

          “What stop father from ending us like he has every rebellion?” Narti one of the younger kids asked.

          “Because when he looks at us he see’s mom.” Marmora stood tall on the bed. “We can make a difference, but we have to do it now. Not for ourselves but for the Universe!”

          Silence filled the room. Then KitKat started clapping. And the others joined in.

          “You got our attention, how do we do this?”


	29. Pump your fist if you would rather mess up than put up with this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The alternative title for this and the previous chapter were going to be Vivalavida lyrics

        KitKat took a deep breath, holding the sword she held thousands of years ago. She was going to free her mother using the sword that bound her to this fate. Taking it from Lotor’s room had been easy, he still kept it in the umbrella bin. All it took was for Michelle, Michael, and Michel to hack into the system and the door opened.

        Now she stood at the entrance to the throne room, the guards had been knocked out by some of Marmora’s ally’s from the blade. She kicked down the door.

        She no longer sat complacent in her Pj’s watching of her siblings. No. She tied her hair up in a high ponytail and wore a purple armor with a skirt, more girly than her father’s outfit, the skirt barley trailed behind her. This dress was what she was supposed to wear to the coronation as crown princess before she gave up the throne.

        “Kitora what’s going on?” Lotor asked.

        “A revolution.” KitKat said. Lotor sighed annoyed.

        “First your brother and now you?”

        “There is a difference father. I’m not here to talk.” KitKat readied her blade. Pidge looked as if she wanted to throw up. KitKat smiled at her mother to reassure her. “You know, I never understood how you could’ve betrayed your father. Slowly as I realized you had become Gramps, it made sense.” Lotor stood up. “One of us isn’t going to be leaving this room alive, and I sure as hell am going to survive.”

        Lotor looked around for a weapon, but found none.

        “Guards!”

        “The guards are unavailable, please leave a message after the beep.” Lotor recognized the voice of his son Siciline on the speakers, and giggling of the younger kids in the background.

        “So you convinced your siblings to start a revolution?”

        “Oh, ho ho. Not me. You know you really should listen to Marmora more!” As if on cue Lotor was tackled to the ground. Marmora held a sacred blade to Lotor’s neck and used the yellow bayard in the form of a shield to hold him down.

        “Now!” Marmora shouted.

        KitKat nodded dashing toward Lotor, only to stop last second with a smile and make a turn towards Pidge who had been been staring in shock.

        “Mom forgive me for what I did that day. But now you’ll be truly free alongside your friends… Tell Allura I’m sorry, and I miss her and my uncles.” KitKat said with a bow. Pidge smiled.

        “It’s ok, I never held you accountable for that. I love you and all your siblings so much KitKat.” Pidge kissed KitKat on the forehead. Then Pidge kneeled. “I will miss you, but don’t think about joining me too soon you hear?”

        “Ok mom.”

        “That goes for all of you!” Pidge shouted. KitKat raised the blade high in the air and brought it down in a strong strike to Pidge’s heart. A smile laid on Pidge’s lips. “Night, my little stars.” Pidge stood up with weak knees with the last of her strength and walked towards Lotor who had just thrown Marmora off him.

        Lotor made a mad dash toward Pidge.

        “Hold on, we’ll fix this!” Lotor tried putting pressure on the wound and Pidge cupped his face.

        “Maybe… I’ll get to see the you who died on our wedding day.” Pidge weakly tugged him down for a kiss. “I miss you Lotor. I love you so much. Even after all this.” Lotor fell to his knees as Pidge went limp. He caught her in his arms and held her to his chest.

        Everything inside him broke and he screamed in anguish.

        “To be fair, I never said ‘Only of us two will leave this room’.” KitKat sheathed the sword. Marmora walked to his sisters’ side nervously. “Go on ask.”

        “So… Is the story about you killing the guy you fell in love with true?”

        “I saw what love does to our family. Look at our Grandfather and look at our father. I couldn’t let myself fall so hard in love that I’d hurt my family. He understood. He was loyal and said that was the only way for him to be happy.” KitKat stared at the broken heap of their father on the floor, clutching a body that should have been dead long ago. “Now what?”

        “… We select an Emperor or Empress.” Marmora said standing tall.

        “I still don’t want the throne.” KitKat said. “I’m going to take care of our father till he dies and joins Mom. You?”

        “… I’ve seen what our family has done to the Universe… The only way I can take action and get results is by taking the throne… But I think I’ll use one of our siblings as my heir.” Marmora said. “If it’s alright with everyone that I take the throne.”

        “You’re the one that led this rebellion, and the only one with any outside knowledge of the Universe. I don’t think anyone will argue against you.” KitKat marched over to Lotor. “Come on Dad.”

        KitKat helped Lotor up and helped him hold onto Pidge.

        The two took a ship to Earth, which had become a memorial for the Voltron Paladins. Lotor had been kind enough to send their remains to Earth with respect.

        The finally came upon a statue, five lions, six paladins. Their names, birthdays and death dates inscribed along with a quote people remembered them for.

        KitKat helped her father bury her mother in the memorial, and they used his sword to inscribe her death date.

        “… I didn’t know her when she was a Paladin… What was something she said?” KitKat asked.

        “… When I was looking through Garrison Security files I found a quote that I feel encompassed your Mother.” Lotor smiled at the statue of his wife.

        It looked like it was based off before she married him. Short hair, glasses, green Paladin armor.

        KitKat inscribed it and smiled.

        “Mom was beautiful wasn’t she.”

        “Yes, all you kids take after her in that way.” The two finally left so Lotor could live out the rest his life naturally.

_You can't keep me out! I'll find the truth - I'll never stop! – Empress Kathrine “Pidge Gunderson” Holt_


	30. I have loved you for a thousand years, I'll love you for a thousand more

 

          Lotor smiled at all his kids surrounding him.  He took his last breath fairly happy.

          He awoke in what looked like a flower field. Greenery all around him. A beautiful night sky above him.

          Was this heaven? He didn’t belong there after everything he did.

          “Legolas you ass!” A voice shouted. A voice he knew and loved with every piece of his heart. He spun around.

          There she was, like a goddess, or an angel. Smiling with tears in her eyes. She was wearing her wedding dress. There was pollen and grass stains on the bottom of the dress, and flowers in her hair.

          “You kept me waiting!” Pidge looked like she wanted to kiss him. Lotor realized then and there he was wearing his wedding attire as well.

          “I’m sorry… I had to finish up with some business before I left.” Lotor picked her up bridal style. Pidge wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him.

          “Don’t we have a honeymoon to get to?” Pidge asked nuzzling into his neck.

          “I do believe we do… Were you lonely while you waited?”

          “Nah, the others were here, but when I felt you were coming soon I asked for some alone time with you.”

          “Point me to the… how do human’s put it? The ‘pearly, golden gates’?” Lotor chuckled. Pidge giggled and nodded in a direction. “Pidge I love you, I have for thousands of years.”

          “I love you too, and I will for thousands more.” Pidge kissed him once again.

          And so they walked across the heavenly field together to be happy for eternity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was torn between writing a happy ending and a Sad ending, and decided on a happy one. Bringing it back to where everything started. Pidge and Lotor's wedding right before their honeymoon.


End file.
